The return back to the Capital for (Y/N) was agonizingly long. Or so it felt like it.
For much of the walk back, he looked at the palms of his hands. While he didn't kill Kurome, he felt responsible for her death. He felt... guilty.
Guilt. There's that feeling again. It was all too familiar to him at this point. But there was something that bothered him.
His response to Kurome's passing.
The more he thought back to their final conversation, the less remorse he felt for her. And for (Y/N), that frightened him.
Frustrated by his lack of clarity, (Y/N) groaned frustratingly as he rubbed his hands up and down his face. He would go mad if he thought about this particular subject any longer.
Then, the creak of a door moaned through the room, the very room that the Jaegers had used for meetings since the beginning. Since Wave was currently MIA and Esdeath more than likely cooped up in her room inside the palace, that left only one possibility.
Run: I hope I'm not interrupting you.
(Y/N): H-Huh? Oh, you're fine...
The lack of another male in the room threw Run off.
Run: Where is Wave?
(Y/N): He's... Clearing his head.
It wasn't necessarily a lie. (Y/N) gave Wave the option to come back or leave solely so he can clear his head. And given that the two weren't on great terms the last time they had a full conversation, it would be beneficial for all parties involved.
Run: And Kurome?
(Y/N): Dead.
He answered as bluntly as he could. Putting together the absence of Wave plus the news of Kurome, he put the pieces together.
Run: Oh. So that's why he isn't here.
(Y/N) didn't respond to this and instead slumped into the chair he was sitting in. Having known him for long enough at this point, Run understood why he was acting this way.
Run: Are you okay?
(Y/N): No, I'm not.
Run already knew the answer to this question, but he figured he'd asked just to check on (Y/N).
(Y/N): *Sigh* THIS is why I didn't want to do this. Everyone I work with ends up dying prematurely. And before I know it, you'll be gone. Then Wave. And then... She'll be gone, too.
He felt himself on the verge of breaking down. But for his own sake, he held it in. Now was not the time to let out and grieve.
Not when the war was so close to its conclusion.
Run: Do you regret your decision in becoming the leader of the Jaegers?
(Y/N) visibly flinched at the question.
(Y/N): Honestly? I do sometimes. It's nothing against you, it's just... Well, you know by now.
Run: *Smiles* I understand. It hurts losing the people you care about. But whether we like it or not, those people will all pass eventually. I think it's important not to remember them for tragically passing early. Instead, those people should be thought about for the good times you spent with them.
(Y/N): So... Mmm...
Run: Is something wrong?
(Y/N): No, I'm just thinking that maybe I'm too pessimistic. I've never really looked at the death of someone I cared about in that way.
YOU ARE READING
Black Heart (Akame ga Kill! x Male Reader)
Hayran KurguBorn as an outsider, (Y/N) was born right on the southeastern border of the Empire in a large town. But with no family or friends, he grew up as homeless orphan, doing whatever to survive. This eventually lead to him fleeing his homeland and living...
