𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 /GXG/

🔸️The Omen

   

          ______________________         

  AKARI TOKIZAKI
______________________

[March 19th]

Yesterday I turned 19 years old. So I skipped school to spend the day with my parents. My mom, Sakura, prepared a chocolate cake with chocolate shavings and strawberries on top.

The three of us were sitting at the small kitchen table in our apartment. I noticed that they looked at each other a lot, probably because I was silent.

Concern about growth is something that scares me. And celebrating a birthday isn't happy what it used to be. This always brings back my fears.

My gaze was downcast at the cake. Mom asked if I was going to have another piece. So, I spent the whole time summarizing my senior year.

Even though my parents are always by my side, giving me their love, that is not enough to fulfill me. I'm missing someone in my life.

''Akari, are you okay?'', she said. Her gaze was concerned at my silence.

I awkwardly answered a weak 'yes'. I didn't want to eat anymore. The smell of the chocolate cake was not sweet. The taste was not sweet. It was a doubt that I put in my mouth and shoved down my throat.

But I didn't want to bother her and waste the time she spent all day.

I took the knife and carefully removed another very small piece, I chewed it without courage and swallowed it because I wasn't enjoying it with pleasure.

Tasteless. My eyes watered. Anguish reactions triggered in my body.

My father, Haruki, slowly stood up and placed his hand on my forehead, worried. Yes, my father knew there was something wrong with me. He is a psychologist, and I couldn't hide it from him.

I could not. I didn't tell them what happened to me. I just know... that I miss someone in my life. I can't say that I'm attracted to girls, because if I say, what if their smile disappears?

I don't even know how I'm going to tell this.

I told my dad I was excited about the celebration. They ended up buying.

Before dark, I wanted to go back to the Christian school.

I left the table. Mom walked with me to the living room door, her hand resting on my shoulder, comforting me. Mom wanted me not to sleep at home.

I said I was fine. A few seconds later, Dad appeared with the car key in his hand. He wanted to drop me off at boarding school.

I refused. I wanted to be alone, walk to school, and use this time to think.

After descending the six floors of the not-so-new building where I live, I could feel the emptiness at peace, walking through the streets of the neighborhood.

I have lived in Itaewon for two years. Before, my parents and I lived in Sapporo, Japan. But I'll tell you later.

It turns out that I decided to change route, take another route, go up to the neighborhood, and I had the impression that on that shopping street, in that store I had never seen that store here.

It was written Tarot reading and mysticism.

I wanted to know about my future, although I never believed in things like that. I have no superstition. But for a few bucks. I looked around, the street was crowded, the problem was that someone I knew saw me enter a mysticism store.