Drugs 4- Yoongi [18+]

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Body drenched in the water coming over him, the man tossed his head back. Causing nothing more than that base of his throat to bob as he slicked back his hair. Even if the man could hardly function. Spending those few nights all alone with neither his child nor wife. Yet the man's life wouldn't simply end because they left. Resulting to him standing there in the shower as that warmth of the water engulfs his being.

And with a breath, the man got out. Placing that single towel lying on the hook, around his hips, only to look himself in the mirror. Revealing everything he would despise each time he'd catch his own reflection. Because the man had realized. Realized that this was the reality he was meant to have.

However, he couldn't. Couldn't stop his eyes from staying just barely red and glossy as he forced himself to get cleaned up. Throwing on both those slacks and dress shirt that hugged his body so well. Making the man look so much better than he felt, as he latched that single watch lying on his nightstand around his wrist. Even if it was then that he caught. Caught his wife's wedding ring lying on that same nightstand. Causing every inch of both his being and heart to ache in manners he never thought were possible. Because he wanted the woman. Wanted the woman in the ways he always got to have her. Wishing that she was there to fix the collar of his shirt. Wishing that she was there to give him that single kiss goodbye followed by a soft I love you.

And with a clearing of the throat, the man shook his head. All while putting on that cologne Ming would crave to smell upon the man. Having always giggled out those smiled you smell so good, baby's to the man who left his room, only to be met with no one at all. No one other than those drugs and weapons lying on the table. Wishing that he could simply see his son stroll out of bed on tired steps. Or his wife in the kitchen while she makes them something to eat as Yoongi walked towards that single coffee table lingering in the middle of the living room. Pulling up that single tray of cocaine he couldn't help but do a line or two of. Because the man could hardly think. Hardly function. And he needed relief. Needed relief so badly.

So, he let those drugs enter his system. All while slipping a single gun within the back of the slacks he attired. Knowing he had to go see the one man who would handle things for him overseas. Because Yoongi was always so cautious. Cautious with who he dealt with. Cautious with who he'd have running drugs for him through countries he knew were risky to deal with.

Yet right now, Yoongi didn't care about the risk. So caught up in his head to care about getting so much as killed. Because the man had lost all he ever loved. And with that, he lost himself.

"Im leaving now. . . Jin should be there before me." He didn't want to be with anyone. Knowing that it was always best to be with one of his boys or the men he'd have keep an eye out for him. Handling things in the ways he would when he was so young. When he had no one to help him but the men he saw as his brothers. When he'd feel like everyday was his last.

And with a breath, the man left. Left his home that didn't feel like home at all without them. Providing the man with a sense of love and warmth he couldn't gain from anybody else but his family. Spending those few nights alone with nothing but alcohol and drugs to keep him company. Having been drinking enough to the point where the man felt like his body would give out on him. Because Yoongi didn't know. Know how to ever handle his emotions on his own without Ming there to help him.

Maybe he could try and show her. Maybe he could put forth the effort of being a good husband and father again. Willing to step back from his responsibilities in order to solely focus on them. Remembering when he wasn't half as occupied. Having been able to dedicate his time to the people he wanted to be with. Taking them out to dinner almost every night. Sitting down and enjoying simply relaxing in their home together. Making him realize why people didn't mind living lives so normal. Why people didn't mind working those regular jobs that they'd hate more than they could actually love. Or why people would settle for living like everyone else because they cherished what they had at home and not everything else surrounding them. Yet Yoongi never had that. Never had that type of lifestyle. Never had that comparison he so desperately wished he could've experienced just once in life.