Poems about the day I opened up about past trauma for the first time. Tw sa.
The call
I remember how terrified I was on that phone call.
I didn't think I'd ever tell you, I never saw the day coming but I'd spent so many years thinking about it.
I had spent so much time preparing for something I told myself I'd never let happen.
But when I answered the phone, my voice gave it away, I knew that I couldn't turn back now.
I told you about the memories and the things he did to me.
And when I told you who it was you didn't tell me I had done anything wrong.
There was not an ounce of disbelief in your voice.
Mattress on the floor
When thoughts are left to stir in my mind then tend to become further and further away from reality by the moment.
I had spent years wondering what would happen if I ever said anything, there was no intention to share my experiences but there was more than enough desire.
I remember there was a moment when I felt more taken care of then I ever imagined.
When I told you about the things that happen on that bed you helped me move my mattress so I could sleep in peace.
You didn't question it, you just helped me feel safe again.
My hopes for him
I wish there was more room for the anger.
I wish people with my experiences could talk about how much I hope you feel the pain I did.
How much I wished I pushed you down the stairs before you got to my bedroom and hit you until my body wouldn't let me.
I hope you never forgive yourself for this.
The house
I've been told all my life I have the perfect family,
Although there is some truth to that I wish it was a completely true statement.
I don't want people to know what happened to me,
I don't want them to know how he touched me and how much it hurt,
But part of me wishes they could see past the family dinners and Tupperware.
Because it's not perfect.
He touched me and today we are going to see if he touched her.
I've never been more angry in my whole life, but I think if he did I will be.
That must be so confusing for a little girl
One thing I will never understand is how someone can hurt someone so small.
He knew I didn't want it, he knew it had to be a secret, I don't care what the laws state he knew better.
How does someone do that to a little girl?
YOU ARE READING
Letters from sixteen
PoetryA poetry book I wrote during periods of my life with many different facets. I wrote about happy moments, addiction, and trauma, the book becomes more depressing as it goes on. I choose the title "letters from sixteen" to capture how I wanted to capt...
