Letters from sixteen

April 14th

Finishing poems inspired by the major arcana.

The Emperor
He is one of the most caring person you'll ever meet,
He holds his emotions with the knowledge that they are slipping through his fingers like sand.
He is far more creative then he will ever let on to.
He is like a book always being filled with new knowledge and understanding.
He leaves you with words that you'll never forget.
He is drinking a cup of black coffee on a Sunday morning coffee shop trip.
He is a conversation that takes you on a trip to Italy from your own backyard.

The Hierophant
I remember one summer I decided I wanted to deepen my knowledge of the world around me.
I spent my break learning about personality types, neurotransmitters, and the history behind common sayings.
I'd use my pens, markers and pencils to make colorful posters I'd hang on my wall.
Soon my room was covered with hours of work for all passersby to see.
I was proud of my work.
Soon the days got shorter,
School was starting,
I took down my posters,
And soon threw them out.
I have intentions to embark on a greater understanding,
I hope to someday soon again begin my journey to a higher level of knowledge.

The Lovers
We met when we were much younger,
Both the weird kids in a small town,
We both experienced judgment from all sides,
But our friendship wasn't affected.
I always enjoyed our long talks about hypotheticals and unlikely futures.
As time went on we grew apart,
Not by choice,
Our lives and worlds were cities apart.
But as life has it we came together,
It was at a party when I realized we had more in common then I ever thought we did.
We shared unique experiences most didn't have.
More parties and get togethers,
Soon it was just you and me.
Your dog barked at me for hours,
I brought over far too many bags,
But I didn't care,
I was happy to share space with you.
We stayed up late walking under the stars,
Our lives had many parallels.
We watched movies,
Although it served more as background noise.
We drew photos of strawberries and people with wings.
Your family liked me,
They took me to the river and went bowling..
Your dad joked about burying me in the backyard.
We talked for many hours.
I was happy to share space with you
All in one weekend,
The last days of spring break,
I stayed over for far longer than expected,
I felt joy I haven't felt before.
I don't know if we'll ever hold hands,
But I hope one day we do.

The Chariot
I remember when I first started writing poetry,
It was in eighth grade,
A valley in my life,
I was in endless turmoil,
I didn't much like life and felt far from happy.
I wrote about my hopes for the future,
I formed many collections of words about my depression and addiction.
I hung a letter to my future self on my wall,
I wished for change, and change I did.
Looking back I've grown in many directions,
And wrote lots of poems on the way.
Looking back I'm proud of how far down my path I've come.
Poetry acted as a friend and a mirror by my side throughout all this.
Since then I've made many strides.
I now have valuable connections,
I feel closer to the people in my life more than I ever have,
I enjoy many days in the sun with those I love.
I wrote my first, but not last book,
I have it in my dresser ready to be read by myself in the far and near future.
I feel happy with my education,
No longer struggling with feeling like the least knowledgeable in the room.
I know myself better than I ever did,
I've made peace with the things I cannot change,
and worked to change the things I can.
I have a sense of direction I never thought I would.
I feel like an artist again,
Since I've made many things I'm happy to look at.
Small accomplishments have added up,
I've filled many notebooks and taken many photos.
I now have many memories to look back on,
Many days I can smile about when remembering my teenage years.
My perspectives have changed,
I've grown into beliefs I'm proud to hold.
My emotional life isn't chaotic and filled with unbearable highs and lows.
I am the person I always wanted to be.