Time Warp (Alastor x OC)

Ch 74

Guys I am literally so sorry I missed yesterday. A lot happened, and I just didn't have enough time to get it finished.

Anyway, enjoy a little vulnerable Alastor.

I haven't had time to draw, but I love this song and I feel like it goes well with the chapter, too.

Love you all, toodles👋🏻

Alastor's POV

I am disgusted with myself.

I am weak.

I am a coward.

I am unfit to be anything to her, let alone a proper husband...let alone a father.

Her question remained inside my head long after I left her there alone...long after I retreated, I could hear her voice...

You'll love them, won't you?

My love...I want to...I want to comfort you...I want to tell you it will all be okay...

I want nothing more than to see you smile.

But I'm scared.

Never before have I felt a fear like this. It feels like something is crushing my lungs, I can hardly breathe...

Why would she choose to nurture something that she physically cannot...what will this do to her...

I don't understand...

My teeth grit hard as I clutched the countertop, trying to force these tears to stop falling from my eyes.

You just left her there, you useless bastard...you just left her standing there all alone when all she wanted was a little comfort, what is wrong with you!

You'll still love me...won't you?

More tears fell down my face, and I tried to even my shaking breaths.

Of course I'll still love you...of course I will.

I will love you until the end of time.

And the baby...our baby...

Edith said...it would most likely not survive...

I saw the heartbreak in your eyes the moment she said that...I saw the breath leave your lungs, and I saw you shatter.

Why burden yourself with such a promise...the promise of loss...?

I'm terrified...utterly terrified to love something so fragile.

It absolutely destroyed me inside to watch her eyes fill with tears at my silence...but I didn't have an answer to give to her.

She wants to know if I will love a ghost...I want to...

I want to be happy...I want to celebrate...

For a fleeting moment, I saw the happiness in her eyes...the excitement. The way she immediately cradled her own stomach, holding a baby that has barely even grown.

She loved it from the moment she learned it existed...

But if our baby doesn't make it...I don't want to see her cry. I don't want her to feel the pain, I don't want her to have her hopes obliterated by one single empty promise.

Fumbling over to the kitchen drawer, I yanked it open and shoved my hand inside, looking around.

After finding what I needed, I sat at the table. My shoulders shook with quiet sobs as I stared down at the smiling face of my mother, captured and still inside a tiny photograph.