Danganronpa: Locked Doors of Despair

Ch.6 Deadly Life Part 10: Of Differences

[A/N] Not me accidentally spoiling one of my twists because I forgot to change a very specific word last part! That's what I get for recycling a first draft I wrote months ago. If you noticed... no you didn't /j And no, it's not there anymore. I fixed it. In other, more important news, next part will probably be the last one (except for an epilogue). I can't PROMISE that-- there may be two more after this-- but it's looking very likely. Thank you all for your patience and for enjoying my story. I hope I make this worth it for you all!

Yuu

My throat feels like it has this awful lump and my head is racing with stupid what-ifs and how-could-I's and it's also starting to hurt from pounding it on the table. I'm trying to hold it together for the rest of the group. I can't take back any of my decisions. The only way I can justify my own existence at this point is to do as much good as I can. I need to do the next right thing, and if that means supporting the others, then it's the clear choice. Fuck ego.

"So, Hibiki, what do you think? We unmasked you. We figured out that we're White Daisy Room, and that we all basically went on a nutso revenge scheme. You mentioned that you'd start talking about where we're gonna go from here. What does our future hold, oh wise WDR leader?" Ren snarks.

As if he hadn't just gone off on Gou for saying that this awful thing we did was awful, Hibiki grins at him. "Oh, you're almost there. Just a little further and I'll start giving you chickadees some shiny options!"

"O-Options, you say?" Azumi asks.

"You're in charge of your own destinies, right? You all made it here alive cause of choices, this whole thing happened cause of your choices, so why the hell shouldn't your ending involve them, too?"

"But we made bad choices." Chimon's voice is hushed and fragile. It hits me again how uniquely vulnerable he is right now. Not only is he the youngest of the group, but he's essentially experiencing emotions he flat-out didn't have access to for a lot of his developmental years. He's out of practice feeling grief.

"Seems to be kinda a pattern with me," Fujiko murmurs. She blinks slow and her body quivers as she tries not to start crying again.

The rest of the group bleakly share the sentiment. I shiver, imagining a world where I was the Blackened in the fourth trial. If I had gotten away with murder and sacrificed everyone to live, what would I have even returned to? Would I have discovered any of this? Would Hibiki have forced me to learn about it and get my memories back all alone? During the mental break, no less. I'm rocked with the certainty that I would've killed myself. I feel itchy and restless. Ha. It all comes back to that, huh? To when Fujiko said she felt itchy because she felt violated? But I guess this is literal, too.

"C-C'mon, guys. We need to keep going. Once we make it out of here, we'll have all the time in the world to hate ourselves, or punish ourselves, or any of that bullshit, but right now, we can't just sit down and quit. We'll starve to death, and then what was any of this for?" Ren reminds us.

"We're almost to the end. We're almost there," Gou urges, like he's herding some exhausted, parched horse. I can't work up much energy, and it seems like the other three are in the same spot. After like, hundreds of times over the months, his encouragement doesn't do much anymore.

"At least this experience will make for great lyrics. It's not like I've already made a bunch of angsty ballads in here," Ren says sardonically. His pink eyes look dull, and the sarcasm he's shown throughout the trial feels like such a far departure from the playfulness and flirtations. I try to rouse myself. Something has to happen. Something has to help, has to work.