Danganronpa: Locked Doors of Despair

Ch.2 Daily Life Part 3: Of Doctors, Dichotomies, and Directives

Azumi

For upwards of eight years, I have intrinsically understood that meditation is of the utmost important to me. It settles my heart when I start to fret myself silly. It helps me to understand myself better. It prepares me for whatever challenge I might face.

It is an essential part of my life. Now, as I am stripped of it temporarily, I feel in desperate need of it. "Are you really, truly intending to drop out so quickly, Tozen?"

"I'm sorry," he responds, holding one arm with the other and avoiding my gaze.

"But think about it this way. If we combine our efforts, we have double the shot of receiving the reward. I am perfectly willing to put every ounce of effort into this and share the prize with you should I outlast the others. Just, please... try."

"Azumi, I can't," he insists. He's in the kitchen, as always, working on breakfast for the rest of us-- gluten-free tempura vegetables, to be precise. Nobody is around; they have all slunk away to attend to their own business, most of them appearing downtrodden, with some exceptions.

"But this could prove to be incredibly valuable! It may very well keep the two of us alive to keep fighting!"

"We don't know how long this will last! I'm not gonna speak for you, but I know that I don't exactly have the strongest willpower! Someone will easily outlast me even if I AM willing to do this! And I'm not!" he grunts, giving the counter a slight pound with his fist.

"Why not? What could be so awful that you refuse to even give it a shot?"

He snatches my arm abruptly and practically slaps his wrist into my hand. The surprise makes me shake a little. I tilt my head to read his no-go code, dismissing the mild blurriness of my vision. Eat anything under 1000 calories. "That. That, Azumi. I'm not gonna actively fucking harm my body for this shit."

"S-Surely there must be something healthy that you can whip up worth that many. I-I mean, you're the Ultimate Nutritionist. You know everything there is to know, right?" I ask. I'm not sure whether my words are encouragement or a plea.

"I-- Yes, hypothetically, but--"

"Then what are we arguing about?!"

He suddenly jerks his arm away from me. I tear my gaze from where his wrist just was. His golden eyes look meek, suddenly. "I... I can't go back to where I was," he whispers, voice cracking.

I have trouble finding words. I can barely even comprehend what's happening. "...What?"

"I'm not... strong, like the rest of you. I can't talk about my problems so easily. Someday, maybe, but... I think you should go. We need to clear our heads. I'm sorry for yelling."

"Sorry for pushing you," I respond, stumbling away. I retreat to the hallway, where I start to pace. My whole body feels hot from the stress.

Okay. Everything will be alright. You simply need to outlast everyone else on your own. You can do that. You'll be fine without the meditation. My breaths start to feel shallow. Just steel yourself!

My vision starts to fill with black speckles and my fingertips look slightly blue. Oh. That's what's going on. I'm about to faint.

"AZU--" I start to hear someone call. But I don't have enough time to hear them finish my name before consciousness slips out of my grasp.

I wake up somewhere distinctly different, feeling something squishy under my body and a pillow under my head. Part of me just wants to keep my eyes shut, but there's rather loud bickering occurring right outside the door.