||My Lovers||HisokaxReaderxIllumi

Chapter 37 / Insult × and × Payback

Today was the day of selection. Tens of thousands of people were marching towards the palace. Also, today was the day you were going to reach out to Gon. You finally realize that you might not be able to escape on your own. You felt bad about not reaching out sooner but it didn't feel right to for some reason.

'Gon.. Are you there?'

You try reaching out to Gon using telepath and to your surprise, he responds thankfully.

'Y/n!? You're alive! Where are you?!'

'I'm in the palace where the King is gathering people, I'm safe for now. The King trusts me, I think but I can't escape on my own, did you get back up?'

'Yeah, the Hunter Association is aware of what's going on, Kite is alive and okay. Actually Y/n, We are attacks tonight, so please be careful until then and when we attack, please take shelter, we will come find you.'

'Hai'

"Y/n?"

You're pulled out of your conversation with Gon from your named being called by the King. You look up at him from the bed you've been since yesterday," Hm?" He comes over to you and sits on the edge of the bed and studies your face. "What's wrong my queen, are you not happy?"

You pout slightly while thinking before sighing and pulling your knees closer to your chest as you were sitting up in the bed. "Not really if I'm being honest.. I want to be able to go out again, be free, be happy, and safe.. I want to be with my family again, King. I'm not happy here being stuck in this palace, this is not the life I want to live.." A tear rolls down your cheek as you stare blankly at the King's thighs.

"Why do you cry, Y/n?"

"Because I'm human.. I have feelings. I'm hurting on the inside and the outside. You have feeling and are part human too you know.." You put your head on your arms and look at the King. He seems slightly shocked. "You have pain on the inside too sometimes?" You chuckle sadly at his question. You honestly pity him for not knowing much about being human.

"Yes all humans get pain on the inside, it's called emotional pain. You could be feeling stressed and/or sad and honestly, I don't blame you for feeling that way, I get that way all the times, it's okay to feel that way, that's we find ways to make ourselves better when feel stressed, angry, sad, irritated, things like that-" You explain to the curious king.

"How do I fix myself then?"

You smile sadly at the question," If you're asking for a permanent solution, there's not, we will always feel those feelings. Some days days are worse than others. I wish there was a permanent solution sometimes but then I wouldn't be human. What's the point of being happy or feeling good all the time? If you're never able to experience those lows, you'll never appreciate your highs. It's kind of like a Ying, Yang thing. You need a good and bad to balance life out.."

The King gets lost in his thoughts for a moment, taking in your words seriously. "Hey, don't think about it so hard, it's okay, you'll eventually get the hang of it, I promise." You smile softly with half pity for the Chimera Ant.

"Do you want to take a nap with me?" You offer to the King while also just wanting to sleep until the attack. He looks at you with confusion. "Why?" You smile and pull him more onto the bed. Falling back into your spot while he lays on the other side, facing you, he still looks confused. "Because why not? Sleep makes time go faster, I don't know about you but I'm tired.."

You close your eyes quickly and snuggle further into the comfortable bed but you still feel the King's curious eyes on you. As you lay there, tiredly, you suddenly feel a hand move hair out of your face making you flinch slightly but you keep your eyes closed.