Just a Soldier

Chapter 13 - Forgiveness

Sophie's POV:

Everything is a complete mess right now. I'm pregnant, my boyfriend decided he can't deal with that and left me, and my best mate thought it was a smart idea to go and attack him! I've never felt more alone than I do in this moment. My head is all over the place and I don't know what to do.

I absent mindedly made my way to open the cafe this morning, but Hannah was quick to send me home, saying that I look pale and should rest. When I get back to my place, I just fall on the sofa and start crying. I keep replaying the events with Matt in my mind. I genuinely thought he was the one. After everything I went through with James, I never thought he could hurt me worse. But turns out he could.

Then there's Y/n. I can't believe she went and punched Matt. She didn't have the right to go over there and react like that. Turning aggressive like that is so out of character for her. I needed her to be by my side and instead she went and sought him like some sort of gangster to make him pay. It infuriates me. I still need her, but how can I forgive her when she so easily did that? What if she has scared him away for good?

Y/n has tried calling me a couple of times this morning, as well as texting. I started off by ignored it all. I know what she'll say. That she's sorry and she didn't mean it. It won't happen again. But I don't want to hear it right now. With every text or missed call I get angry again so I end up sending her a reply telling her to stop call or texting. That I don't want to hear from them. I can do this without her right?

I'm pulled out of my thoughts by a knock at my door. I reluctantly get up, praying that it's not Y/n. I can't be dealing with that right now. When I open the door, I'm shocked when I see Matt standing  there, a bunch of flowers in his hand and a sheepish look on his face. The swollen nose and two slightly black eyes didn't go unnoticed. "Hi." He whispers hesitantly. I don't know what to say, but my body betrays me when it instinctively moves to the side to let him in.

He walks into the living room and holds out the flowers towards me. "These are for you. I know they can't make up for anything that has happened. But I hope that you'll at least hear me out. Then I'll go and you never have to see me again if that's what you want." He says, with a lot more confidence this time. I sigh but reach out to take the flowers. They are roses, my favourites.

He follows me into the kitchen as I find a vase to put the flowers into. We stand in silence whilst I cut the stems and then move back into the lounge to place them on the coffee table. He follows once again like a lost puppy, so I indicate for him to sit. We sit in silence for a while whilst he gathers his thoughts.

I don't plan on being the one to talk first. He is the one that has explaining to do. Eventually, he has seemed to pluck up the courage to talk. "I know what I did was unforgivable. But I truly am sorry. I was terrified when you said you were pregnant, and I ran. It was the biggest mistake I could have made." He is talking fast as he speaks, his eye flicking between mine, but he holds eye contact.

"I know this is not what either of us had planned, but I want to be there for you. I want to support you and go to all your appointments with you. I want to be a good dad to this baby. If you'll have me back." He speaks hesitantly, tears forming in his eyes. I can't believe he is sat in front of me telling me this. I thought I wouldn't see him again, that he was done with me. This was the real Matt that I know. Caring and thoughtful. "I was a coward and I put my own thoughts and fears before even considering how you must have been feeling. But I promise you I'm not going anywhere. Even if you don't want me back, I'll still be here every step of the way."

I can tell he is telling the truth. He never was very good at lying to me. "Matt, you really hurt me. I was scared too, and I needed you to tell me everything was going to be ok. But instead, you just gave up and turned your back on me." I choke back tears as I speak. I am still so angry with him, even though I'm so happy that he's come back to me.