The Light of Dead Stars | KSJ

25

The next few days are painfully slow. You're better by Wednesday but the doctor advised you to work from home for the rest of the week since the medicines would still make you feel weak and sleepy. Jin finally goes to work to attend meetings but he always comes home early and eats dinner with you downstairs.

It's finally the end of the week and you convinced Jin to go out to see the Han River with you. You've been stuck at home, in your room for a whole week and you just want to breathe the air outside and look at the sky and watch strangers walking about. He agrees and picks you up at home after an evening meeting.

He takes you to one of your favorite Southeast Asian restaurants and he talks about work while you talk about the series that you binge-watched today. You go to one of the parks you liked to frequent when you still had the time, something that Jin isn't that much familiar with.

"I'm into the outdoors in so much as fishing or golfing goes," he shrugs, earning him a chuckle. "But going to the park or a river and just people watch like this? Not really my thing."

"So do you go fishing or golfing when you want to think?"

"I fly somewhere and just walk around and find places to eat by myself," he smiles. "Rich people things, I know," he chuckles, "but eating alone helps me be in tune with myself, you know? Like, I don't have to converse with anyone. If I do, it's with a stranger who gives me something new to think about. But other than that, it's just a foreign city and its food and me. That's what I do to think."

"Hmm, I like that," you grin. "For some people, food is just sustenance. To some, it's a form of love and service. And then there's people like you, where food helps you discover yourself. It's pretty amazing what food can mean to people."

He drowns in your eyes and your smile and waits for a bit before he asks. "Is this what you do when you want to think?"

You nod.

"So what are you thinking about?"

You're now both seated at a bench in a more elevated and secluded area. You can see the river against the buildings and the night sky, which is shining a little brighter than usual. You think it waited for you to be like this.

"Do you know much about astronomy?" You answer him with a question.

"Not really," he responds, adjusting his position so he could see a bit more of the view. "Just the basics, you know, the ones we learn at school? I mean, the sky's pretty, especially at night but it's so permanent that I just don't mind it much. I heard that the stars we see are dead, though. That one's pretty mind-boggling."

"Interesting," you hum. "I think it's that permanence that makes it intriguing to me because for all that it is and the fact that it's always been there, the human mind just can't seem to fully grasp it. Like the stars that we see - which aren't actually dead because it takes about a billion years for them to die - are light years away. And we're looking at what they were before."

"Huh, I thought they were dead," Jin frowns.

"It seems quite poetic and dramatic to believe that they're all dead, isn't it?" You chuckle. "But they're very much alive, though they'll still die. But the idea remains - they could be dead and people would still be looking at them when they were still alive, because it's technically the past we're looking at, like the star during its glory days."

Is this what you think about every time you're looking at the sky? He wonders.

"Hmm, isn't that a nice thought though?" He says. "Something could be gone but we still get to see and appreciate the beauty of it as if it's still alive."