My Very Own Winter Soldier.

Chapter 8

Closing the door behind me, I immediately phone Steve. I am going to kill him.

He picks up on the second ring, "Hallo beautiful, what a nice surprise."

"Do not beautiful me!" I almost scream. "Do you have any idea what you are asking of me? Your friend does not talk, just stares. I have spent half an hour with him and I know nothing. You hear me, Steve, NOTHING. How the hell am I supposed to do this job when he won't talk to me and what exactly is my job?" By now, I am screaming.

I convince myself that my slightly hysterical breakdown must be my body's way of dealing with the stress I have been experiencing since the minute I was told to come here.

Hearing him chuckle on the other end of the line only pisses me off more. "What is so damn funny?"

Laughing louder, he replies, "You."

Whining just a little, I reply, "This is not funny, Steve. I've never felt so unprepared for a job. All I got was "get your butt there ASAP." What the hell does that mean? Plus, I don't babysit, I coordinate."

Hesitating for a second, I continue, "And he makes me really nervous, Steve."

The very unwelcome afterthought "and really horny" flutters through my mind, but I refrain from saying that out loud.

"Chelsey love, calm down. How is ordering and receiving goods for his personal comfort different from ordering and receiving ammo for a mission? And you won't be babysitting. You will be assisting. Please, Chels, I just need someone there to make sure he is ok." he pleads, "I feel responsible for what happened to him. For the last seventy years, all he knew was violence and abuse. I know he did terrible things, but that wasn't Bucky. He was and still is my best friend. Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky. I just want to be there for him now. I just need to give him a chance to remember who he is. Can you understand that?" he asks softly.

Dammit! I can't fault him on that, and when he sounds so vulnerable, how can I say no?

Sighing, I answer, "Fine, but you owe me big time! What exactly do you want me to do?"

"Just make sure he is comfortable, and Chels, you do not need to be scared of him. He wouldn't hurt a fly. The real Bucky is the most caring and kindest person I have ever known."

"Yes that he may be, but he still doesn't talk. When I asked him what he would like on his menu, do you know what he asked me? Whether I was aware of the fact that he had been frozen for most of the last seventy years and that food wasn't a priority. I should surprise him. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?"

Laughing Steve replies, "Look, sweetheart, put yourself in his shoes. Growing up, we didn't have half the choices we have today. Just give him whatever you normally get me and take it from there."

Sighing again, I reply, "Ok, I guess I can work with that. What about clothes? Any idea what size he wears?"

"Well, I'd say his about my size. I'm sure whatever you decide to get, he will be grateful."

I know what that sounded like and no! Steve and I are not an item. I just by accident became his sort of personal assistant three years ago while we were working together on a mission. He needed some personal stuff taken care of, and I was available. Because he hates shopping and is off on missions so often, I sort of kept my unassigned job as his personal assistant and often buy his clothes and groceries for him. I think that if it wasn't for me, he would probably starve to death and walk around naked most of the time. We ended up becoming really good friends who often spend time together. Besides, he is the one male with whom I feel completely at ease.

"Fine, but if he hates whatever I get him, I'm telling him it's all your fault." I joke.

Laughing, he replies, "You do that."

After a slight pause, he clears his throat, "Chels, thanks for doing this. He didn't deserve what they did to him. I just want to make sure he gets the chance to live the life he really deserves. Just spoil him a bit for me. This.... what you are doing for me, helping him find a small part of what is normal to us... I won't forget it." he says, causing a lump to get stuck in my throat.

Feeling a little ashamed for freaking out earlier I reply, "I can't promise he will be happy with my choices for him, but I can promise that I will do my best to make things as comfortable as possible for him."

"I knew you were the right person for this!" he exclaims.

"Wait, are you telling me the story about Kevin and a family emergency is a lot of BS." I ask.

"Yes, I'm sorry, but I did not think you would volunteer for this assignment, and you are the only person I trust to do this for me. He needs someone to look after him so that he can concentrate on getting better, and I don't know of anybody else who can do that better than you. I promise I will make it up to you." he says, sounding serious.

Trying to lighten the mood, I laugh, "Yes, you will! Just the several nervous breakdowns I had on my way here will take you at least a year of presents and pampering to make up for."

"Can't wait!" he laughs, and then on a more serious note, he says, "You know my account details. Buy whatever he needs and charge it to my credit card. No limit, ok? Just make sure he gets everything he needs, and Chels, please don't let him know I am paying for it."

"Ok, will do."

"Thanks again, sweetheart. I am going to try and get up there in the next 2-3 weeks, sooner if I can. I will see you then. Love you."

Smiling to myself, I reply, "Can't wait and love you too."

The minute the line goes dead, I pull my laptop out and start browsing. While talking to Steve, I already started organizing and planning in my head. By the time we finished talking, I knew what I wanted to do. I ordered ten new shirts, all long sleeves, because it is winter and it gets freezing cold here. I also ordered three jeans, two pairs of sweatpants, some underwear, some socks, a thick jacket, two thick jerseys, a pair of sneakers, and all the toiletries he may need. I call the control room to ask Kurt if, by any chance, he knows what brand of deodorant and aftershave Sergeant Barnes uses and whether he knows his shoe size (I had to try). He doesn't, so I just wing it. He looks like an 11 to my trained eye.

The bedding he has on his bed looked thin and on the old side, and because it is already very cold here, I also ordered a new duvet and pillows, plus the linen to go with it. Come to think of it, he probably won't need it, seeing that he spent most of his life in Siberia, but I choose to stay on the safe side and buy them anyway. I also ordered a fabric wardrobe and some hangers to put his new clothes in. If he is going to be here for a while, he may as well get comfortable.

After paying for everything and arranging for it to be delivered the next day, I turn to my notepad. Now for the menu! After some contemplation and discussing it with Sara, we decide to stick to the same menu she uses for the security detail staying here. The only change I make is to double his portions, even though Sara warned me that he wasn't eating his meals. The faster metabolism of Sergeant Barnes, thanks to the super soldier serum flowing through him, means he will need to eat more than the average man in order to keep his strength up. I guess it will be up to me to make sure he eats his meals.

Last but not least, I contacted the office of Dr Christina Raynor and arranged a time and date for Sergeant Barnes' first psych appointment. Steve wanted someone who was not affiliated with SHIELD, and because she is a brilliant psychologist with a military background and is a good friend of Steve, she was the obvious choice. Her practice is in Washington DC, so I also arrange for a helicopter to take her to and from the facility. Having done all of that, I close my laptop, and for the first time since I got here, I feel better about the whole assignment. It is nothing I have not done before, and I feel somewhat better about working with Sergeant Barnes. Now that I know a bit more about him and after talking to Steve, I don't feel so nervous anymore.

This pesky reaction he has on me, however, is a major problem. I blame my nerves and the fact that he is way more presentable than I thought for my temporary loss of control. Oh, hell! Who am I kidding? Everything about him screams alpha male. Combine that with his actual reputation as the Winter Soldier and his masculine good looks, and you have a very lethal and sexy combination. But I absolutely can't go there, period! He is still a potentially very dangerous man, and I will do well to remember that.