My Very Own Winter Soldier.

Chapter 22

CHELSEY

It's seven o'clock, late enough to not look suspicious if I go to James' cell. I am worried sick about him. There was something about the way he hugged and kissed me that felt so final. I need to speak to him. Reassure him that everything will be ok.

When I get to his cell, it is empty. All his stuff is still there, except his rucksack.

"Oh please, God, don't let him do something stupid." I plead to God.

That rucksack is his bug out bag. I know because Steve keeps a similar bag in his flat. On my way back, I run into Kurt.

"Morning Kurt, I am looking for Sergeant Barnes. You haven't seen him by any chance?" I ask, trying to appear calm when, in actual fact, I am busy falling apart from worry.

"Morning Chelsey. Yes, he came by earlier to let me know he is going to explore the area a bit today. Wanted to make sure we don't think he escaped if we don't see him." he laughs.

"Oh ok, will you please let him know I am looking for him if you see him." I ask.

"Sure thing, but I doubt he will be back before lunchtime." he says, making me worry even more.

This sounds suspiciously like someone who is making sure no one is going to look for him until he is long gone.

I decided that I should phone Steve. He will know what to do. Going back to my room, I get my phone and dial his nr. He picks up after the third ring.

"Chelsey, love, what can I do for you so early in the morning?" he asks.

"Steve, I can't find him. Something happened, and now his gone. He took his rucksack with him, and the guard said he told him he was going to explore, but I think he might be planning on leaving the facility." I babble, close to hysteria.

"Chelsey, calm down. Are you talking about Bucky?" he asks.

"Yes, yes. I can't fi...." I say before Steve interrupts me, "He's with me."

"He is? Oh, thank God!" I say, feeling the relief making my knees go weak.

"Wait, what do you mean he's with you?" I suddenly realize what he just said.

"I picked him up half an hour ago. We are on our way to Wakanda. Don't worry, I told Jonathan what is happening." he explains.

"Wakanda? Why are you going to Wakanda?" I ask, trying to make sense of what is happening.

"He is going to stay there until Shuri can find a way to get rid of HYDRA. Look, Chels, can we talk later? I will come pick you up on my way back, and then I will explain everything." he says, leaving me no other choice but to say goodbye.

BUCKY

Steve phoned an hour after I phoned him to let me know he is on his way. Half an hour later, we were on our way to Wakanda. King T'Challa gave the ok for me to come to Wakanda. They have a cryogenic chamber there, and that is where I will be spending my time until Shuri has perfected the algorithm she thinks will be able to get rid of HYDRA.

Wakanda is situated on the east coast of Africa. With the Quinjet, it is going to take us about four and a half hours to reach Wakanda. We haven't been able to talk, but I already decided to tell him that I woke up wandering outside after I had a nightmare and that it freaked me out enough to not want to stay around people anymore. He knows how scared I am of going into Winter Soldier mode again, so I think he should believe me. They are expecting me so I can go under as soon as we reach Wakanda.

I know running is the coward's way out, but for the first time in my hundred years on this earth, I choose to run. It's not just the shame I feel about not being able to control myself. It's so much more. I will never be able to forgive myself if I do something to hurt her again. It doesn't matter that I wasn't aware of what I was doing, I still almost killed her. I don't want to see her again because I don't know if I would be able to get on the jet then. That's how strong the hold is that she has on me. She is probably going to hate me for this, but I'd rather she hate me than take a chance at hurting her again.

In the back of my mind, the hope that this won't take forever still lingers. Maybe Shuri is close to perfecting the algorithm, and just maybe I can still go back to Chelsey. The way she made love to me must mean something. I am sure she also has feelings for me, but then maybe I just choked her love for me out of her this morning . God, I hope not!

CHELSEY

I've been wandering around the house like a lost puppy. I already miss him. My neck started to go blue where James had choked me. Thankfully, I have enough Turtleneck shirts and jerseys to cover it up. It's past seven pm when Steve arrived back at the facility. After he had something to eat, we got on the jet and were in Washington DC by eight thirty.

While he ate, he explained what happened. According to James, he woke up wandering around outside after he had a nightmare. He had no recollection of how he got outside. It scared James enough to decide that he needed to get away from people. By the time Steve left Wakanda, he was already in cryogenic stasis.

He lied to Steve. I am glad he didn't say anything about what happened between us, but at the same time, I am hurt. Does him not wanting Steve to know about us, means he doesn't care enough about me to tell his best friend. He didn't even say goodbye.