A Most Dangerous Weapon

Chapter 22: What I Fight For

They all just continue to stare at me, completely silent.

I expected them to ask me questions about escaping Gaius' prison, or yell at me for ruining Tiberius' reputation with Maximus. I thought they would attack me for what I did to Lucius, their gladiator brother. Or perhaps they would laugh at me for requesting their help after I abandoned them to be a royal. I assumed they would all show me just how much I was hated, and that I deserved whatever form of torture I faced after deceiving them as greatly as I did by hiding my gender and identity.

But they didn't do any of that. They just stood there, waiting...

"I know that I don't deserve your help, but I need it. Everything Rowan told you about our plan was true; we intend to build an army of gladiators, train a royal bastard to rule, and then eliminate both Maximus and Gaius to end this war. I have nothing to offer you in exchange for your assistance, just as I have given my four friends back there nothing to compensate for their allegiance. We're just a handful of people in need of change, and we feel like the only way to ensure that it's good is to make it happen ourselves. We can't let one of the brother's win this war, or else we will forever be slaves to tyranny and death."

Some of the men exchange looks, considering my words thoughtfully. Quintus remains unchanged, so I press on.

"I was once a gladiator, just like you. We live by the sword, and we die by the sword. Now that our sport no longer holds importance in such dark times of war, shouldn't we take up our swords to fight in a real battle?! Shouldn't we find our fame and glory by changing the course of our Empire's future? We could fix what Gaius and Maximus have broken, in the name of Hannibal Artorius Regulus!"

I can hear footsteps closing in behind me. I don't break eye contact with the gladiators, pulling their focus away from my approaching friends to continuing influencing them.

"You have no reason to trust me. I lied to you about who I was, I killed your friend to take his place in the tournament, I took your celebrated Doctore to be my private guard, I married into the royal family..." I hold out my hands in a gesture of surrender, exclaiming, "... I have done countless things to betray your trust, so I understand if you choose to walk away from this. But just know this... you wouldn't be walking away from me, but from the people. This isn't just Maximus' or Gaius' war, or even my war. This is your war. It always has been, until the bitter end. We've all been fighting it for the past two decades, even if we never took a step onto a legitimate battlefield." I take in their curious expressions, throwing my hands wildly about to emphasize my words. "Don't you see?! Maximus and Gaius have made the whole world our battlefield! Villages are pillaged and stolen. Young adults and children are taken to be trained as soldiers, guards and assassins. Marriages are forced onto unwilling parties to manipulate the people into submission." I look directly at Quintus as I mutter, "Gladiators are used as a means of distraction, making them no more important than an amusing story, a joke, or a stray dog... they entertain the masses at the expense of their own lives in order to distract the people from the reality of this war."

Quintus takes a slow step forward, angered by my insults. He wants to deny it, but he knows I'm telling the truth. When I don't flinch away from his imposing glare, he backs down.

"It's time for you all to take a more active role in this war. And not just to get revenge for yourselves, but for us all. It's time to fight for the ones who came before that we lost, and to save the ones still yet to come." I pound my fist against my chest. "I fight for my father, Augustus Calpurnius Galeo, who was falsely accused of treachery and beheaded by Maximus' order. I fight for my brother who is still missing, my mother who was killed, and the woman I called Grams who raised me when no one else wanted me. I fight for my friends that I have lost- Bash, Reegan, Phaedra, Melina and Torrann. And I fight for the people I killed- the orphan boy in Brixen, Pontius from the pits, and your friend Lucius..." I pause after saying his name, hoping they can all see how sincere I was being. When no one strikes back at me for saying his name, I continue, "I even fight for Decimus. He was my friend and husband, not our enemy. I fight for the friends I still have, your former Doctore and gladiator brother Evander amongst them, who are currently lost somewhere in search of me." I throw a hand back to gesture towards whoever was standing behind me as I say, "And I fight for my friends who just risked their lives to save a bunch of men that they don't know, all because they believe in this cause." I step forward once more, closing the gap between us. "And I fight for you, even if you choose to walk away."