A Most Dangerous Weapon

Chapter 26: The Weight of it All

It was crushing.

I was lying down in the middle of the clearing, legs and arms sprawled out as I squinted up into the sky. I watched the clouds as they slowly rolled by, carefully monitoring my breathing in an attempt to relax.

But Rowan wasn't about to waste this opportunity.

"We could cut our preparation in half if we give up on the royal bastards. All we need are the gladiators and you..."

"I'm not taking the throne, Rowan." I state with as much conviction as I can muster despite my exhaustion. This constant argument of who will be taking the throne was really starting to weigh on my nerves.

"Just hear me out." His face suddenly appears overhead, blocking my view of the serene sky. He looks down on me with a serious expression as he explains, "The Romallian people already worship you, as if you hung the sun, moon and stars! You called for revenge on Galacia when Decimus died, and now that you've been taken as a prisoner they've decided to finish what you started. The people respect you, so they'll follow you to the ends of the earth. That's what it takes to be a true ruler. You're good at this, Candra."

"That's your opinion-"

"That's the people's opinion."

I shake my head in annoyance. "All I did was sing a stupid song! That doesn't mean I can lead the people."

"You did more than just sing a stupid song."

I bolt upright, startling Rowan back. "Tell me what I did to earn their loyalty as a ruler, because I sure as shit don't know! Everything I can think of just shows how selfish I've been..."

"You fought in the Capital arena-"

"I did that to save my brother, not the Romallian people."

"But they took it as a show of strength and courage for the Romallian collective. And then you became The Miracle of Romallia."

"I didn't give myself that title! I didn't do anything for them to earn that-"

"You survived impossible odds. That was enough."

"So I suppose becoming a Princess was also something I did for the people?" I spit back sarcastically.

"A lowborn Romallian girl became royalty... of course they see it as an act for them."

"The Empress just told me to play along to survive. It's not my fault Decimus loved me." I point out.

"But he did." He states matter-of-factly. "It doesn't matter how selfish your motives were; whether you did these things to save your brother or yourself."

"So basically the people want me on the throne after a series of misunderstandings! This is ridiculous!" I stand to march around the clearing in a huff, trying my best to keep my anger in check. "I can't lead an entire Empire! And I can't understand why the people and you seem to think I can! Fighting in the arena, playing dress up in the palace, and being a soldier in a war do not make a ruler. There's so much more to the title than that..." I considered the role my birth mother played as Empress, and then combined it with the role Maximus had to play as Emperor. "To be a ruler takes a great amount of sacrifice and bravery. You would need a political mind, an empathetic heart, and an iron fist. A monarch must feel paternal love in equal measures for both their children and their people. They would have to handle the Empire's commerce, agriculture, policies and safety, all while preparing the future for their heir. They would have to be prepared to give up their own happiness and sanity for the sake of their Empire's legacy!"

Rowan stands firm with his arms crossed over his chest. "The fact that you know all this makes you ten times more qualified than anyone else."

I stop in front of him, glaring daggers. "Knowing this does not mean that I can do it! If that were the case, I just made you just as qualified."