madness and ecstasy // leo valdez

- wrong aesthetic sweetie-

They all would've died at least five times on the way to the front door if not for Leo. He was amazing. First it was the motion-activated trapdoor on the sidewalk, then the lasers on the steps, then the nerve gas dispenser on the porch railing, the pressure-sensitive poison spikes in the welcome mat, and of course the exploding doorbell. 

It was like home alone, but MA15+. Leo deactivated all of them. It was like he could smell the traps, and he picked just the right tool out of his belt to disable them.

Piper had found some burn cream in the first aid kit, it obviously wasn't designed for laser accidents, but it seemed to do the job. It took the sting off the injury, just leaving a hot throb behind, and Teqi was going to have to put a bandage on it at some point.

"You're amazing, man," Jason said in awe. Wrong move. Leo scowled as he examined the front door lock. 

"Yeah, amazing," he said, self-deprecatingly. "Can't fix a dragon right, but I'm amazing."

"Hey, that wasn't your—"

"Front doors already unlocked," Leo announced, cutting him off. 

Piper stared at the door in disbelief. "It is? All those traps, and the door's unlocked?"

Leo turned the knob. The door swung open easily. He stepped inside without hesitation. What an idiot. Teqi had to fucking baby sit this dude. Maybe she should bubble wrap him. She tried not to laugh again at the thought of the small boy packaged up in Styrofoam. God, wrong time brain.

Before Jason could follow, Piper caught his arm. "He's going to need some time to get over Festus. Don't take it personally." 

Teqi knew all about getting over things, "grieving takes time Jason, you can't rush it. Even if it's in the middle of a quest." And then she followed mister bubble wrap into the dark mansion. This was how horror movies start.

The only thought Teqi had when she walked in, apart from the millions of worries about everything, was dark. That's it.
From the echo of all of their footsteps, she could tell the entry hall was enormous, even bigger than Boreas's penthouse, if that's even possible. But the only illumination came from the yard lights outside, and the stars though the large windows. A faint glow peeked through the breaks in the thick velvet curtains. The windows rose about ten feet tall. Spaced between them along the walls were life-size metal statues, or carvings. As Teqi's eyes slowly adjusted, she could see sofas arranged in a U in the middle of the room, with a central coffee table and one large chair at the far end. A massive chandelier glinted overhead. 

Along the back wall stood a row of closed doors. Not completely menacing at all, obviously a clown wasn't going to pop out of them and stab them all to death.

"Where's the light switch?" Jason's voice echoed alarmingly through the room, startling Teqi. 

"Don't see one," Leo said numbly.

"Fire?" Piper suggested. 

Leo held out his hand, but nothing happened. "It's not working." 

That was worrying, but it wasn't on the top of Teqi's what the fuck is happening list. She would have to add it. "Your fire is out? Why?" Piper asked curiously.

"Well, if I knew that—"

"Okay, okay," she said, obviously shocked at Leo's rudeness. "What do we do—explore?"