The Shadow Sholdier

Make it stop!

It's 11.36am now.
I sit on my bed.
There are some clouds now.
In my files were only photos of me that showed my serious side, but the photo Fury showed me to remember Steve looked more chaotic and fun.
I take my phone and text Natasha: „Hey, do you have some photos of me before I was gone? I only got those in my files and I wanna know how I looked six years ago."
I do the same thing with Steve.
The only thing that changed since then is that my hair got cut and I aged a little.
I look outside again.
My thoughts get more and more.
-Why do I trust them?
-More important: Why do they trust me?
-What does Nat want to know from Tony?
-Does Bucky remember me?
There's chaos in my head.
I take off the earphones, stand up and go to the bathroom.
-Will I find myself?
I turn on the water and wash my face.
-Will I get my memory back?
-Is Hydra really coming for me?
„Make it stop!"
I look up.
Normally I'd see myself suffer again, but luckily I don't have a new mirror yet. It echoes briefly until it is completely still again.
„There's no way.. that this will ever be fixed."
I remain silent for a short moment before i walk back to my room and sit down again.
My head's still full but I won't cry today because of this bullshit.
I lay down.
It's not fair.
I lived here, I had a life, I had friends, family.. and now?
Now everything is gone, along with my memory.
I look at the ceiling and sigh.

Eventually my phone lights up.
I take it and see a text from Natasha: „Yeah I got many. I'll send you some :)."
She right away sends me some pictures.
I text her back: „Thanks." and look at the pictures.
There are many people, like Steve and Tony but also Sharon. On most of the pictures are just Natasha and me.
I smile slightly.
There's a pic where we look at the sunset together.
I think I now know why I always look outside.
Steve texted me too: „Yes, here you go." and also sended me some pics. He also texted: „What'd you like to eat? We'll order pizza soon."
I text him back: „Thanks for the pictures. I'd take a pepperoni pizza please."
„You're very welcome. We'll eat at 12.15."
„Ok."
I put my phone away.

Someone knocks again.
„Yeah?" I ask.
Wanda opens the door.
„Y/N?"
„Yes?" I look at her. „Is everything alright?"
She looks a little stressed.
„Have you seen Vision today?"
„Vision? You mean that red guy with the yellow stone in the head?"
„Yes, him."
„No, to be honest. Why?"
„I haven't seen him too. Normally he's one of the first's to be up, but he wasn't."
„I'm sorry, but I didn't see him. Maybe Steve knows where he is."
She nods.
„Ok, thanks anyways."
„Your welcome."
She leaves the room.
I turn my head and I look outside again.

„Y/N?"
I stand up quickly and look around, see nobody and try to find something to protect myself with.
„Who's here?" I ask.
„I'm sorry to scare you, Y/N."
Vision comes through the walls in my room.
I look at him in disbelief.
„Vision?"
„I'm sure you are a little confused about all this and I understand that."
I stare at him.
„You react in a quite similar way to James."
I don't say a word.
„I guess you have some questions. I'll answer them if you ask me."
I tilt my head.
„What.. are you?"
„Good first question and also the same James asked. Well, I'm a vibranium-based male android, created by Ultron, a AI, to serve as his body."
„And what is that stone in your forehead?"
„It's a infinity stone, the mind stone to be exact."
„A infinity stone?"
„Yes, a infinity stone. There are six, each one allows it's owner extreme control over one aspect of the universe: time, space, reality, mind, power, and soul. When all six are directly wielded together, nothing is impossible for their bearer."
I raise my eyebrows.
„Ok, ok, that's a lot of information at one time."
„I'm sorry for the confusion."
„No, it's alright, but please just don't fly through the wall to get in my room."
„A bad habbit of mine."
I smirk.
„Wanda asked for you." I say.
„I know."
„You know? Well, she looked a little stressed and worried, I think you should see her."
„You're probably right."
I nod.
„Thank you for the little talk." I say.
„You're welcome. You can ask we everything, anytime."
„I'll keep it in mind."
„Good." he says and walks out of the room.
‚Well that was strange, but at least I now know what he is.'
I sit down again and look at the time.
It's 12pm now.
I should probably go to the others.

I take my phone and walk to the kitchen.
Wanda, Vision and Steve sit on the couch.
I walk to them.
„Hey guys." I say and sit down, next to Steve.
„Hi Y/N."
They continue talking, I just listen.
I look outside.
Again, there are so many thoughts in my head.
Where are the other infinity stones, if Vision is one of them?
What type of AI is this Ultron?
How is it possible for a AI to have it's own body?
I draw my eyebrows together and stare outside.
Wanda said that he's one of the first ones who's up, does he even need sleep?
I'll just ask him later.
My thoughts won't stop.
But why did he compare me to James? As if the others hadn't reacted just as confused as him.
How the hell does he fly through walls?
„Are you alright Y/N?" someone asks.
„Huh?" I look at them again.
„Are you alright? You looked outside for like 3 minutes." Wanda says.
„Oh- I'm fine, thanks. I just really like the view." I respond fastly.
„Mhm."
Suddenly it rings.
„Pizza's here." Steve says and stands up. „Could you message Natasha and Bucky."
„Yep." I say and text them.
„I'll bring plates." Wanda says and stands up.
Bucky comes into the room.
„Where's Natasha?" I ask.
„I don't know, I guess she'll come." he responds and sits down to us.
Steve walks in with the pizza and Wanda puts the plates on the table.
„Ima text her."
„No need to." Natasha says as she walks in. „Sorry, I'm late."
„It's alright." Steve says.
She sits down next to me.
„What do you think about the pictures I've send you?" she asks me.
„I've looked at them for quite a long time. My favourite is the one where we look at the sunset together."
„I like that one too, it was here in Manhattan. It was our favourite place, we visited it almost every weekend, if we had time."
I smile slightly.
Steve distributes the pizzas.
We eat together.
It's such a comfort atmosphere.
No stress.
No anxiety.
No thoughts.
Just everyone being happy and talking.
„I also saw a brunette guy on the pics, who's he?" I ask Nat.
„Oh that's Clint, Clint Barton. Remember when I told you about him in the lift? That he'd be so happy to see you? That's him."
„Ok."
After everyone finished, Wanda again took the plates and cartons and brings them in the kitchen. Vision helps her.

Bucky, Steve, Natasha and I remain sitting on the couch.
„So when do we start to train?" Nat asks.
„In 20 minutes, I'd say. Then we'll meet in the gym room." Steve responds.
„Ok." she responds.
I stare outside again.
She taps my shoulder.
„Hm?"
„Let's go up, I'll give you some sport clothes."
I nod.

We stand up and go to her room.
It's not bigger than mine.
She opens the dresser and gives me a sports bra, a crop top and shorts.
„You can keep this, it's to small for me."
„Thank you."
She nods.
„We'll meet outside in 10 minutes, ok?"
„Yep." I say and walk to my room.