The Nearness Of You

32

Jinnie

I'm almost done with packing all of my remaining stuff but I couldn't seem to finish. I stop for awhile and took gaze of my now empty room. Yesterday, I gave some of my belongings away to a charitable institution since I cannot carry all of them with me. Only the bed, the dresser, and the empty cabinet remained and the last of my belongings which I am now putting in my bag. I let out a heavy sigh and went to the living room. I sit on the couch and scanned the whole place and I smile for a bit. This used to be a happy place. And now it's just empty.

I remember the times when Yesung and I were still together living here. I never felt alone because of him. He took care of me and kept me away from harm. We had a peaceful life. We had fun. But now he's gone. Just like Seungri. There's nothing left for me here. That's why I decided to leave.

It's been a week since I last saw Yukii, and after that encounter I've been thinking a lot whether if I should still stay in this place or leave. After a few days I've finally thought about it. The only way I could move on is to go as far away as I can. I'll just hurt myself more if within each passing day I couldn't help not to watch Seungri from afar when I know for a fact that it's impossible for me now to have him back. Seeing the one you love that doesn't remember you and is now happily in love with someone else is like being stabbed by a knife a thousand times in your chest and yet, you're still alive. You're dying from the inside which is worse rather than being dead because you've drowned or have fallen from a tall building. I still love him, but I couldn't live like this. I am now like him, a mortal, and the clock is ticking. Raziel's words echoed in my head. Treasure every moment of your life while it lasts.. I look up the ceiling and felt hot tears stream across my cheeks. Seungri, he's my life. The one I want to spend every moment with in this lifetime. But it will never happen, though I used to believe that it would.

I stood up and wipe the tears on my face and went to get myself water from the fridge. There I saw a piece of paper. A written list of some of the few things I have to buy before I leave and would be needing for my travel. I glanced at my watch and saw that it's only eight o'clock. The train departs at eleven. I still have time to go to the convenience store, finish my packing and fix myself. After drinking a full glass of water I changed my shorts to sweatpants, put on a hoodie and head out.

I was about to go downstairs when Mr. Darwin, the old man living beside our unit called my name. It seems like he's fixing his doorknob.

"Good morning, Mr. Darwin." I greeted him.

"Good morning, Jinnie." He smiles at me. "Leaving already?"

"Uh no, Mr. Darwin. I'm headed to the convenience store to buy some stuff." I answer.

Mr. Darwin sighed heavily. "First it's Yesung, now it's you. I wish the people that will live in that unit after you would be nice too, same as the two of you." I saw sadness in his eyes even if he doesn't say it. And if I were still a Grigori I might've heard his thoughts as well.

"I'm pretty sure they will be." I just assured him.

"Where are you going anyway?" He asked me again.

I shook my head. "To be honest, I still don't have an idea." I chuckled a bit. "But I'll be heading South that's for sure." I tell him.

"On a plane?" He asks.

"On a train." I tell him smilingly. "I have to be at the train station by eleven a.m."

"I see." Mr. Darwin nods his head. "Well then, off you go. But make sure to say goodbye to me before you really leave." He smiles at me.

"I'll make sure I will." I smiled back. "See you later, Mr. Darwin."

A/N:
The ending is near... And Jinnie is leaving... What do you think will happen now? Stay tuned for more updates. ;) Love ya'll! :*

--Katie