a perfect contradiction • lrh

chapter fourteen ⛈️

She is like the flowers;
But also the rain.
She's the beauty of the day;
But also the nights filled with pain

a/n
Panic attack warning indicated by ⛈️
the end of it indicated by 💙
Mentions of alcohol misuse

*

The problem was Luke and his damn mood swings.

She wasn't stupid. Today would be full of tension, flirty remarks, even a kiss but she didn't trust it would last past sunset today. By sunrise it would have faded.

The lift door almost shut when his fingertips grasped it, flinging it back open. "Hey, what happened?" His voice is full of softness, full of concern.

"Nothing, don't you worry about it" she grumbled, turning her back so she couldn't see him. He always found a way to change the subject or her mood and it was starting to piss her off.

Luke's eyes darted around the lift, studying her body language, her folded arms, turned back, her breathing shallow and quick. She was so angry with him in the space of about ten minutes, it almost gave the poor boy a whiplash.

"Please...El talk to me" he pleaded, hand resting on her shoulder, turning her around, the shortened nickname bouncing off her cold exterior.

"Tell me truthfully, what will happen tomorrow? Will this continue or will you go back to your old ways?" Her words sat heavy in his chest because truthfully, he didn't know.

His eyes fell to the floor, concentrating on his converse."uhm...I erm..I won't shut you out if that's what you mean?" awkwardness in his stutter.

Shit Luke you can do better than that, he whined in his head.

His response was pathetic, empty and seriously lacking. But emotions and feelings weren't his strength. Luke had been stuck in a world of self pity and anger for the past couple of years and being honest with himself about the anger part, it was probably the only reason he was still alive because without it he, he wouldn't have felt at all.

Her jaw clenched, irritated by his response. The lift door opened, "at least have the decency to look me in the eyes when you lie" she spat, words cutting him deep, her venom unlike anything he had experienced from her before.

He couldn't even be mad at her. He knew his response was awful. He was screaming internally at his reactions and words. It felt like his insides were being torn apart the more he tried to open up.

Eleanor disappeared down the hall, Luke hot on her heels, hand colliding forcefully on her door stopping her from opening it.

"What the hell are you doing?" She frowned, looking up at him expecting nothing more than a sentence of stutters and utter crap.