Only for Myself

Mom

I finally let myself
cry.
I'm trying to go
about my day.
And live a normal fucking life.
But the thought of losing you
again
makes me terrified.
Everything is still
all fucked up.
We need you.
I feel guilty for waking up
still loving life,
and you're in pain.
I'm asking anyone,
anything,
to let you get better.
Please don't leave me.