My Dirty Sinner

Chapter 34: Dad and Brother

☆Kyara☆

It wasn't until I had calmed down, pretty quickly I might add, that I realised it was because of the bed. It smelt like my Soul bands, and I realised it was probably the washing powder or fabric softener that I liked. So I made a note to ask about what the guys use, so I could sniff out this smell, as I hadn't found it in the laundry room.

I climbed out from under the covers and looked around to realise this was the room I hadn't been in before, and it was a mess. So after using the ensuite to sort my eyes out and splash water on my face, I cleaned the room up, airing it out, putting dirty clothes in a pile and straightening everything up.

I did it because it made me feel better, but I would need to figure out if this was someone's room or if it was one of the spares. There weren't any pictures up on the wall or in frames on the side, so I'm going with the latter. Though there were clothes and quite a bit of tattoo gear and computer stuff laying about, so I could be wrong.

Once I was done and my eyes looked normal, I checked to see if the coast was clear. Seeing it was, I hurried out and across to the stairs to head down and find people. Everyone had been nice to me until that point.

Jimmy, though, he had always watched me, and I knew something was bound to happen, I just didn't think he would be so brazen as to do it inside the clubhouse. I thought he'd try to corner me down the side where the rubbish bins are kept or some other remote, barely used place.

The rest of the day went by and everything was going fine, I put Jimmy to the back of my mind and was too scared to tell anyone, as I know these guys stick together and well, I've seen the way they treat and speak to the girls they call DSW's. Which I found out stands for Dirty Sinner Whore. The difference is that all these women are consenting, I'm not. I'm not a whore. I fucking hate that word. Jace would always say 'I'm treating you like the filthy whore you are'.

I was putting clean glasses away, readying for the evening shift, when hands slam down on the bar with a bang.

"Get me a fuckin' beer… 'N' 'urry up!" My heart in my throat, I spin around and see  it's Jimmy. I feel like I'm back with Jace, and to stop any repercussions for not doing it fast enough, I rush to grab the beer, and hesitantly pass it to him, but he grabs my hand and leans into my ear. I'm not only scared of him right now but having multiple flashbacks of Jace that I freeze.

"Ya fuckin' tell anyone 'bout earlier… I'll wake ya from your sleep 'n' fuck every hole as I slice pretty lines inta ya skin-"

"Fuck off, Jimmy. You're scarin' 'er, 'n' she ain't interested in a prospect. Leave 'er be or I'll be tellin' a certain someone, ya touched 'n' are tryin' ta make a move on his woman!." He grits his teeth and lets me go, snatching the bottle of the bar, and the look he gives me sends chills down my spine. It's a look of listful, hate.

"Scoff… She ain't no one's old lady, so they can't do shit! Mind ya business, Katy-ann." He sneers and then walks away. As soon as he's out of sight, I gulped in the air, not realising I was holding my breath, and fell to the floor, having a full-blown panic attack behind the bar.

I put my head between my legs and my hands over my head as I start rocking back and forth. This isn't good. I really can't breathe.

"Breath, Kyara. Ignore that little fuckin' shit. I'll get Blaze ta tell him ta leave ya alone. 'E won't bother ya 'gain, just calm down." She watches me pull my wrists to my nose, but the smell, it's gone. I need to go back to that room! She sees the panic in my eyes and looks worried.

"Katy-ann, we need ta get one a the guys ta- What 'appened?" Sarra asks, walking around the bar, seeing me on the floor. When did she get back? She left to go on her date with Soul yesterday. She stayed there the night, probably making love with him all night. It drives me crazy thinking about them that way, and I want to hate her. But I can't! She's too damn sweet, and it isn't her fault she's with the man I want. The man I'm falling for. Even though he isn't here, he still plagues my thoughts. My dreams.