Breathing Again

Butterflies

Rob's POV:

I couldn't have heard that right, could I? There she was, the most vulnerable, gentle, caring, beautiful girl I have ever met, standing infront of me, saying such things. A minute ago she confessed to being cronically ill and now she's worried to drag ME down? Oh my sweet girl... How could I not see this? We stayed in contact as friends for these years... How could I not notice anything? I guess I was so overwhelmed by her coming out that it distracted me too much from what was acutally going on with her. Maybe that was part of her plan, to keep her situation from everyone, especially the public. Everybody should be busy focusing on her being bi that nobody looked too closely on anything else concerning her.

I didnt know how to respond. This changed so much. I thought she was happy all this time.

"Kris, could you please stop worrying about me for a second? Please? I understand that this is much to process right now and I will give you all the time you need but please let me be your friend and help you get through this as far as I can, okay?" I lifted her chin up to look into her eyes. It looked like she gave in, she nodded at me and gave me a half hearted smile.
"Thanks" I responded and kissed her forehead before turning towards the door. "Rob?" Her croaky voice came from behind. "Yes?" - "Thank YOU."
"I didn't do anything. See you in the morning, okay? And you know where to find me, just in case..." I said.
"Yeah, sleep tight. Goodnight Rob"

Not to my surprise I couldn't find sleep anytime soon. My mind was spinning. When I saw 2 missed calls from Suki on my phone, I felt nauseous. Shit. She doesn't deserve this. Here I was, getting confronted with my past not missing her at all, worrying about my first love while she was home thinking about me. What do I do now? Do I lie to her? I decided to send a quick text. "Sorry, I had a few drinks, didn't hear your calls. Get to know party. I'll call you tomorrow. Sleep well." Technically that wasn't a lie.

I must have fallen asleep soon after that, because my alarm was the next thing I heard. Rehearsal day one. I decided to grab a coffee at the Starbucks across the street before heading towards the hotel's conference room where we would have table reads today. Of course, I wasn't the only one, there was a line of people waiting for their orders already.

Kristen's POV:

After ordering my coffee I turned towards the back of the coffee shop to wait for my name to be called. I was busy looking at my phone when I heard an oh so familiar voice ordering a coffee and two blueberry muffins. I looked up just in time to see him turn around, catching my eye and smiling at me. "Good morning" he greeted me with his deep morning voice. Kristen Fucking Stewart, I thought to myself, why do you let your knees get weak because of two words coming from your ex. You're ENGAGED. My whole body cringed at that thought. I would never get used to this. Ever. "Hi" I simply responded, praying that nobody noticed my slightly blushed cheeks. He approached me and just when I wondered how to greet him (do we hug infront of these people here?) I heard the lady's voice from behind the counter. "We have Kristen.... aaand Robert coming right up". I caught a few people looking at us when we went to grab our orders. I could tell from the way she looked at us that the Starbucks girl was a Twilight fan, but I was glad she didn't say anything. Once we were on the street he handed me one of the muffins saying: "I know you like to skip breakfast when you're nervous but you have no reason to be. Enjoy, I know it's your favorite." He smiled at me and the butterflies I didn't know existed anymore emerged in my stomach. I took the muffin from his hand and my hand lingered on his for a second longer than necessary. I gave him a quick grin before taking a bite.