Love & survival (Daryl Dixon x oc)

Forty-three

I was on my way back inside when I found Judith's and Atlas' car seats empty and covered with blood. My legs collapsed as I processed what happened. "NO! No, no, no, no! ATLAS!" I cried and looked around, hoping he was somewhere around here.

Walkers were coming closer to me and I got my axes and killed all of them. I saw red again. Pure red.

I ran out of the prison and into the woods. I heard a child screaming for help. I ran towards the noise and saw it was Luke who was being attacked by five walkers. I decapitated them and hugged Luke. I broke into tears together with him.

"Are you okay? Are you bit?" I asked him and I felt him shake his head. I sighed in relief.

We were walking around in the woods. I was looking for a sign of anyone, but mostly Daryl. I didn't find anything.

I left marks on the trees. We made a mark that would cross over the other so we could also know if the other had seen that they were finding the other.

Luke and I came across a cabin. I cleared it and spent the night there. When he was asleep I let myself break down. I had to stay strong for him. I lost everything because of one son of a bitch. I lost everyone because of one son of a bitch. The only one I had was Luke. Everyone else was dead.

---

It had been a couple days. I had been teaching Luke how to shoot and use a knife. He was a quick learner. He was able to kill walkers on his own now. He reminded me of Carl a year ago.

Every minute I longed more to hold my son and Daryl in my arms. I got more angry while time passed. I knew Luke noticed, but I couldn't stop it.

When he was sleeping he always had nightmares. As did I. I didn't ask him what they were about. He didn't ask about mine. I let him come to me if he needed my help. I thought that the best way to 'help' him was to let him give me the sign if he needed it.

---

It was a regular day, as far as the days were regular. There were a couple dozen walkers outside of mine and Luke's temporary house. We were eating a squirrel.

I had taken down more. I went outside when we finished our meal. Luke was right behind me and we started killing them. It was going as usual. Until I heard screams from nearby. Luke's screams.

I looked over to him and saw he was being eaten. "LUKE!" I yelled and slaughtered the walkers feasting on him. "No, no, no, not you too." I cried as I held him in my arms while breaking down.

"You're gonna be alright. I'm not gonna let you die. You're gonna be alright. I'm gonna save you." I sobbed, my voice was cracking.

"It's okay." Luke didn't shed a tear. He had become incredibly tough. "You're going to be okay."

"When did you grow up?" My voice broke again. Tears were rolling from my eyes.

"Just now."

I was too busy crying to reply. I couldn't lose him too. Not while he was the only one I had left. I loved him as a son. He was my son too.

His lips moved into a small smile. "I love you, mom." He said before his eyes closed and his breathing stopped along with his heartbeat.

"I love you too, Luke." My voice broke once more. Now the only noise that came out of me were cries. I lost everyone. I was the reason everyone I loved was dead. I couldn't protect any of them. I was too weak too, but too strong to die.

---

Days passed. I barely had any food left and all I did at night was cry. I didn't sleep. The loneliness was destroying me. Me alone with just myself wasn't ever going to end well. I was going to mentally abuse myself with my imagination.