I Hate You ~ Louis Tomlinson

I DON'T HATE YOU

When Natalie comes out of the bathroom, she finds Harry and Liam almost done cleaning the entire kitchen.

"Guys, you didn't have to do that!" She exclaims. 

"You cook, we clean," Liam says with a smile.

Zayn stumbles out of Niall's room. "Sorry I would have helped, but I had to put him to bed," he says and rolls his eyes. He comes up to Natalie and slings his arm around her shoulders.

The pizza comes out perfect, but of course Louis is of no where to be found, he's probably just downstairs, but that's not the point.

Whenever the boys walk in, and it's like they are in a different world. Louis isn't sweet, he doesn't try to make her laugh, he doesn't stand close to her or look into her eyes. He's cold and this time she was honestly shocked. It's literally like a shock to her system, and it hurts. It actually physically hurts to feel the difference.

Natalie can't stand it, which seems dramatic, but they are with each other all the time. They work in the same place, live in the same place. Eat almost every meal together. They don't have space from each other and since she doesn't have other friends around here and it feels like all she has is the boys.

She hasn't brought up his mood swings to him, but now she has to or else she's going to explode.

After they all eat she goes into the basement to confront him, she feels like she has to. She waits until the two of them are alone and then not so maturely addresses the issue.

"Oh my gosh. You're so fake." She says scoffing.

"Excuse me, what?" He says whipping around to look at her.

"You heard me. I said you're fake."

"Oh yeah miss know it all? How's that?" He seethes, giving her a judging once over. 

"How's that? Really? You're that daft that I have to explain it to you?"

"Yeah, guess I am," he says sarcastically. "I have no idea what you're on about."

"What I'm "on about"," she says using air quotations with her hands sassily, "Is the fact that you're fake. One minute when we're alone, you're in the kitchen with me. Joking and laughing and holding me. Then when the boys are here, you act like I disgust you."

"You don't disgust me," he says quietly.

"Really? Could have fooled me. You don't even look at me Louis, when they're there you don't even look at me," she pauses and sighs, running her hands over her face. She's so frustrated and confused.

"You make me feel like I'm crazy. I don't even know how to feel because it's like there's two of you, but there's only one of me."

"I'm the same. I'm always the same." He argues, but he doesn't sound mad. He sounds upset and like he's willing his few words to reach her, but to her, his words aren't making sense.

She scoffs.

"You always interrupt me." He says annoyed.

"Were you even saying anything?"

"I was before you interrupted me." He says sassily.

"Well I won't do that again; I won't say anything. I'm all ears." She says dramatically folding her hands and staring at him.

"You wouldn't want to hear it." He sighs.

"Louis, I am literally sitting here giving you my full, undivided attention. What else can I do?"

"I don't know."

"Well can you at least try to figure it out?" She says exasperated, throwing her hands up in the air.

"You don't think I'm trying?" He asks angrily.

"I don't even know what the problem is." If she thought she was ready to explode earlier, she surely is now.

"You think I don't know that? That's the problem."

"Ya know how you could fix that? Tell me." She says sassily.

"Right, yeah I'm going to have a heart to heart with you when all you do is give me an attitude." He says rolling his eyes.

"Oh that's rich."

"What?"

"You started it! You're always the one who starts it." The two of them are unraveling and there's no end in sight.

"Wow, real mature."

"Do you see me fight like this with anyone else? Anyone else?" She says emphasizing the words.

He's quiet.

"Right, you just sit there and don't tell me anything and just keep stringing me along and making my job difficult and then make me laugh and then hate me and whatever else you feel like at the moment."

"You make it out like I'm a monster." He looks at the ground as he says it. 

"You're not a monster Louis, but you have to admit the way you treat me isn't fair." She says calming down the slightest bit, but talking seriously.

"Right, no yeah. I should treat you like everyone else and act like you're a princess. I should kiss the fucking ground you walk on."

"Wow. That's low. You know I don't ask for any of it. And they're my friends Louis. They like being there for me, I don't force anyone to be my friend. I don't trick them into it."

"Well you must do something." He mutters under his breathe. 

"Are you jealous again?"

"God you're so full of yourself." He scoffs. 

"And you're full of it."

They're quiet for a minute, just looking at each other. Neither of them knows what to do at this point. They fight all the time, that's for sure, but they have never fought this bad or for this long. They know how to hit each other's pressure points and now they are tired, angry, and both of them have feelings they aren't really willing to address.

Usually one of the other boys will step in to stop them, which both helps and doesn't. It's good because then they can take time and cool down and then move on, but bad because they never really say all they need to.

Louis has talked to Zayn about his feelings and Natalie talks to Harry so at least they are able to get their frustrations out somewhat, but it doesn't solve anything. She's scared to say what she's actually feeling to Louis, she has no idea how he will react or what it would mean. They work together, they live together, what good could come of it?

But what good is it to be fighting with him all the time? And why does he act like this toward her? Sure, at some points she thinks his feelings are similar to hers, but he can turn it off with the flip of a switch, she can't do that.

"I can't do this anymore." She whispers.

"What?"

"I can't do this anymore." She turns to walk away from him, but he stops her.

"What do you mean you can't?"

"Pretty self explanatory that is." She mumbles, "I can't stay here and have it be like this and have you hate me, I just can't."