JADE (young justice/robin)

45. help (year seven)

Gotham
January 11, 15:21 EDT

jade.

The music faded out as the long routine finished.

I'd fallen down twice.

Cissie didn't even say anything. This far along, she waited for us to correct ourselves as she stared in silent disappointment. That left us to catch our breath, self-loathe, and then start over.

Miles tried to give me some encouragement. "It's an off day. Just have to warm up to the routine."

An off month more like. I'm as warm as could be—this routine was practically imbedded in my blood. That didn't change the fact that I wasn't very present.

"Is something wrong?"

I'm heartbroken and alone.

"No."

"I'm just asking because you've been a little zoned out for a while. You know you can talk to me about it. That's why we're partners."

I kept it short and to the point. "Going through a breakup. That's all."

"Oh... I'm sorry." It didn't seem like that was the answer he'd expected. Maybe he'd assumed I was stronger than that; that I wouldn't be upset over such trivial things. "How long were you two together?"

"I guess five years, on and off."

"Wow. That's a long time to be with someone."

My eyes fell to the floor. "Yeah... it is."

His hand squeezed my shoulder. "I know it sucks, but it's just a part of getting older. You know, figuring out who's supposed to stay and who shouldn't."

He was the only person I wanted to stay. "I guess."

"Do you mind if I ask how it happened?" Then, he quickly cautioned, "You don't have to tell me if you're uncomfortable."

Discomfort wasn't what I felt, and it was hard to boil everything down into a single instance—a single reason. We had about a thousand. "He got tired of me."

"I can't see how anyone could get tired of you."

Really? I mope and I barely speak. Actually, I could think of a million reasons why someone would get tired of me.

I shrugged. "I'm a lot to handle."

"You seem pretty low maintenance to me."

"It's not really that. It's... more of a baggage thing, I guess."

"Carter, if I'm honest, I don't think he deserved you if he couldn't handle it."

I think it's quite the opposite. I didn't deserve him considering all that he handled.

He wasn't even there, yet I felt the need to defend him. "He's a good guy. I got lucky."

"I'm not saying he's a 'bad guy'. I'm saying that maybe he was equally as lucky to have you too. You just don't see it right now because you're upset."

Cissie's annoyed voice cut in, "Are we skating or what?"

Star City
February 28, 20:06 EDT

"I really don't want to do this."

Arrow didn't care. He was practically dragging me by the arm into some community college that held group therapy sessions. He and Artemis thought it would be a good idea to help me "move on."

"Trust me, this'll be good for you. Ollie brought me a few months ago and it's really helped."

"I'm sober already," I pointed out. "I thought I was done needing help."