Adopted But Not Saved

Breathing Troubles

(Ava's POV*)

My chest is tight and it feels like there are bricks on it. I have two small tubes in my nose and around my ears and neck helping me breathe. My eyes flicker open.

I see a hole in my chest, covered by a plate with a tube coming out of it and hooked to a machine. I look over to the side and see Nick sitting on the couch on his phone.

"Hey, i got to go." He says to the person on the other line and hangs up. "Hey Ava, how you feeling?" He whispered.

"What happened?" I moaned.

"You were shot." He whispered. "And it's my fault."

"What? How? No its not." I look at him.

"I let you in there. I was a smart ass and it got you shot." He said as a tear escaped his eyes.

"It was my choice. I wanted to. we had no way of knowing that she had a gun."

"We could have checked. I'm so sorry.

"Its not your fault." I paused. "When can we go home?" I asked.

"You have been here for over 2 weeks. I can probably talk to the doctors and get you to leave early on supervision."

"Okay." i answered as he left the room. I looked down at my wrist. The one i had cut had been wrapped better. That means they all know what i did.

"You can. But you need to promise me something." I nodded. "You can't hurt yourself, ever. If you need to talk i am here. But nothing is going to happen. It's okay now. Your'e safe."

I felt tears in my eyes.

"But-"

"No buts. I cant stand to see you hurt. Especially when it is my fault. Nevermind hurting yourself."

"Okay."

"Good. Now lets get the doctor to undo all this wire crap." I nodded.

The doctor came in and it hurt a lot when they took the thing out of my chest. They put in stitches and we left.

"Hey, i am sorry about before. I just dont like to see you hurt." He said putting his hand on mine in his front seats of the car.

I say with posture, and turned my neck and looked at him. "Its okay."

"Good. Nobody knows you are able to come home, so dont say anything."

"Okay." I nodded.

When we arrived at the precinct, he helped me in.

"Oh my god. Ava. I am so sorry." Carisi yelled as he came up to me and wrapped his arms around me. I moaned. "Sorry. I didnt know you could come home today. I didnt even know you woke up."

I smiled and then notice amanda. She was staring at me with tears in her eyes. I walked up to her.

"Whats wrong?" I asked her.

"Im sorry."

"I really wish people would stop saying that. Its not your fault."

She wrapped her arms around me. "I love you."

"I love you too." And i sat down next to her at her desk. I was really tired and i fell asleep sitting up at her desk. I felt some body pick me up and lay me down again on a cushiony thing. I tried to open my eyes but i couldn't.

I stayed asleep for awhile. Still in pain, but i can handle it. I can handle a lot. And its really painful.