Calamitous Love - jegulus

No more denial

"Prongs mate you have to move on"

That's all I've heard since first year after asking the one and only Lily Evans out. And getting rejected. Over and over again. It's 5th year now and I really thought she'd finally give me a chance.

"Maybe you're right"

It hurt to admit, it really did. But maybe she really just doesn't like me.

"We know you like her but it's been years and it's getting sad..."

"Slightly pathetic too"

"Getting? Just move on already",
Remus finally looked up from his book and scoffed.

"Not helping. Remember we need to be gentle with him"

"Oh shut up. Guys I'm fine. I'm over it."

"Suuuure you are prongs. Anywayyys there are more important things, like the celebration for our latest win??"
Sirus was kinda right for once, not that we're going to tell him though.

"I'm not going"
I know she'll be there. And after the final humiliating rejection I don't need to see her just yet...

"James. No. More. Sulking. Its giving me a headache" Peter said rubbing his temples.

"Didn't realise my poor heartbroken self bothered you so much wormy"

"As long as there's alcohol, im in"

"That's the spirit moony!"
Sirus was already was too hyped up for tonight. I'm not cleaning up his sick again this time.

~~~~TIME SKIP~~~~~

Gryffindor parties were always wild but this time we really outdid ourselves!
All houses were there, even the ravenclaws after beating them today.

Sirus was shirtless on the common room table using an empty bottle of firewhiskey as a microphone, singing god knows what.
Remus was...drooling? He was clapping and cheering, what a great friend!

I couldn't enjoy myself. Laying on the floor semi drunk I finally have time to reflect and i hate it. How could I let myself get rejected for so long? I wasted so much of my time and my love for someone who doesn't want me.

"You look like you're about to cry"

"Pete! No, probably just get firewhiskey"
Peter joins me on the ground and looks at me with a look full of pity.

But then his facial expression changes. Oh god...

"This needs to stop. You know what needs to be done..."

"NO Pete! I don't want to randomly hook up with some stranger"

"Who says it needs to be a stranger? Just find someone hot and stop thinking about... you know who."

"I wouldn't know where to start.."

"Start by standing up maybe? I know you're obsessed with ...you know... but don't think I haven't seen you staring at someone else!"

"I have no clue what you're talking about."
How did he realise??

Of course I stare at Regulus, it doesn't mean anything. He's nice to look at. But I never make it obvious and I know nothing will come out of it. Sirus will make sure if that.

"James.. just go for it! At least tonight. He looks back at you yknow. And oh look! He's right over there by the drinks! GO"
Aaand now I'm being pushed away. But Petes right and this could be my chance. I can do this!

I can't do this.
I made it to the table but can't turn to face his direction. But I can't go back to my spot because I know Pete will kick my ass.

"Potter?"

Oh shit.

"Oh heyyy, you come here often?"
what. Why did I say that??

Regulus looks over to Evan and Barty who are trying to hold in their laughter. But then they start walking away and we're left alone.

"Why aren't you with Sirius"

"what? oh yeah he's kinda busy"

"Well do you want a drink or are you just gonna continue standing there?"

"yeah sure!"
Yeah, a drink will help.