Calamitous Love - jegulus

Conflicted

"Why do I keeping messing everything up"

"Pads love I really think you should take a nap or something."

"He hates me. James does too.."

"Sirius we've been over this. He doesn't hate you, he's just processing a lot. And James doesn't hate either. He's just being there for Regulus."

"Do you think it's my fault?"

This had been going on for days. It had been a week since Sirius had found out about his brother and kind of brother are dating. Sirius was genuinely happy for them, for Reggie and was handling everything quite well. But he had messed up as a big brother.

Regulus was mad at him, probably had been for a while and finally had a chance to let it out. And James was on his side. That's where Sirius started feeling just a little mad again. How could they gang up against him and ignore him? He was trying.

Remus felt conflicted, seeing his boyfriend so upset and mad and god knows what else he was feeling. He felt bad but he knew Regulus had a right to ignore Sirius. And he was proud of James for having his own opinion.

"Sirius give them some space. And me some peace please."

"James hasn't spoken to me in nearly a week..."

"He has been sleeping in Regulus' dorm a lot. But give him time, he'll come around."

But James too had no clue what to think anymore. He was finally officially dating Regulus Black. He was happy, but he missed Sirius. Regulus stayed with James and spent Christmas with his dorm mates and Pandora, so he missed his Black dinner party. And he paid the price, with a howler right before school started again.

Christmas was different that year, Sirius and Janes were apart. But they still gave each other presents, leaving them in secret places only they knew about. For Christmas they always have each other something to match their animagus form, marauders tradition.
Regulus gave James painted red converse and received a litter box from James. But he made up for it with annotated books. He didn't receive anything from Sirius, but he didn't expect much anyway.

Regulus opened up more to James, explaining how he too protected Sirius and never got the credit. How hurt he was and how neglected he felt but his own brother. It didn't sound like the Sirius he knew and he was on Regulus' side.

"James?"

He felt a tap on his shoulder, he was sat on the windowsill in Reggie's dorm again.

"You can go talk to him, I don't want you to choose between me and my brother you know."

James turned around, he looked straight into Regulus' gorgeous eyes. It was nearly scary how similar they looked to his brothers. And it definitely scares him to know how much hurt and tears Sirius caused those perfect eyes too.

"I'm on your side, we're a team. It's you and me and-"

"My love, you and Sirius are two absolute idiots. You need each other to spare others from your insane ideas once in a while."

Regulus had taken hold of James' hand and looked down. It was hard to tell whether he was nervous or if he just preferred to look down but James didn't mind.

He looked up confused,"why are you smiling like that?"

"You called me love!"

Rolling his eyes he pushed James up from his spot and guided him to the door.
"I do hope that isn't the only thing you took from that, now go."

Regulus felt bad that he was keeping Sirius and James apart. He was angry at his brother, years of being ignored and left alone with their parents finally caught up with him. But he didn't want to be labeled as the controlling, angry boyfriend of James Potter who keeps him hostage in his dorm. Scary maybe, even jealous would be better.

He also knew Sirius might be hurting. Why did that have to bother him so much?

So James finally made it back to his dorm. In Regulus' clothes and his hair even messier than usual.

Why was he so nervous?
Opening the door, he saw Sirius and Remus talking to each other. Where was Peter?

"Prongs! You're back."

"Hey Pads, hey moony. I haven't been gone that long, have I?" It really couldn't have been that long.

"Well it's been a week." Sirius said quietly. He sounded hurt, was his face red?

"Do you want to talk about the elephant in the room or just sulk and make things even more awkward ?" Remus said, uncomfortable with the energy in the room.

"Yeah I don't really know where to start. But you hurt Regulus. And I've messed up enough, I can't afford to lose him. So you better step up Pads. But I really missed you and I don't like being mad at you." James was terrible with confrontation, but Regulus really helped him mature just a bit. He was teaching James to stick up for himself and to be confident.

This being the first time James confronted him like that, Sirius was proud. Was his brother really auch a good influence?

"I'll try but I'll need help."
Deep down Remus knew Sirius was hurting and didn't know if he could believe that.

"See? Amazing. Now let's go find Peter and go to the kitchens! We haven't done that in ages."

And so the marauders once again snuck around and broke school rules. But Remus left just a bit of tension. With classes starting up again, it was just easiest to ignore it and hope for the best