Fervent Keeper (FK Series #3)

Kabanata 38

Silence enveloped us after. I didn't know how to react. He was telling me he wasn't over me. I couldn't even breathe when we were staring at each other, not wanting to break off the contact.

"I know you've moved on from me," he muttered with his raspy voice. "I'm just taking my chance on you... on us."

I looked away.

He continued driving until I found myself in our house.

"Thanks for the ride," was all I could say.

"Welcome. Always."

Pagkababa ko ay naramdaman ko pa rin ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko. I couldn't even sleep well that night because all I could think was him and his face that was etched with so much longingness.

Lander:
Good night, Farrah.

He's really trying to sneak his way to my heart. I didn't reply and just decided to take a sleep.

Lander's message was the first one I saw when I woke up.

Lander:
Good morning, my sunshine.

There he goes again. He would keep on sending messages that I never bothered replying.

Lander:
Good night, my sunshine.

Naiinis ako kasi hindi ko na naman maintindihan ang sarili ko. When the next day came, no message was received from him. I knew I didn't expect him to continue sending messages, but I was disappointed for some reason. I heaved a deep sigh. I almost scowled myself for behaving this way.

Hindi ko na dapat siya napansin. No'ng unang beses kaming nagkita, dapat matagal na akong lumayo. I was so scared to admit that I still love him. That even if we ended badly, my heart still yearned for him. I was scared to know that if I let him again, he would hurt me the same way as he did before.

Isn't it ironic how we want the person that much even if we know they would crash us down?

Maya maya ay sunod sunod ang natanggap kong mensahe mula sa kanya.

My heart hammered instantly upon checking it.

Lander:
I'm sorry. I was busy the whole day.

Lander:
I know you're not expecting my messages. But, I would like to remind you to eat on time and sleep well today.

Lander:
I'm too tired to even talk today, but thinking your face made me went through.

Ilan lang 'yon sa sunod sunod na mensahe mula sa kanya. I held my phone tightly then I decided to just keep again inside my bag. The turmoil inside my chest was trying to make its way again.

It became my routine the next day reading his messages. I never bothered replying.

Lander:
Good morning. Kumain ka na ba?

Lander:
Just eat if you haven't yet.

Lander:
Take care always.

I kept my phone inside my bag again and continued spending my day the usual. Angela would come to my house from to time to catch up on me. Even if she was busy with her pending works, we still managed to hang out.

"Inom," yaya niya.

"I still have work tomorrow."

She rolled her eyes. "Tara na, minsan lang. Order din ako pizza."

Wala akong nagawa kaya pumayag na lang. She won't stop bugging me if I kept on refusing. True to what she said, she brought pizza and can beers. We were in the living room as we talked about our lives.