Do you remember me? (skz fanfiction)

25

Jeongin PoV

We stood in front of the door. It hadn't changed. It was still standing in the middle of that field. I was afraid that it was no longer there and we had no other chance to get to the others. "So this is this door... That leads to another world?" Kai asked with knitted eyebrows.

"Yes. When you see it you will believe me," I said, walking towards the door. I grabbed the doorknob and hesitantly opened the door. I squeezed my eyes shut to not see if it didn't work. "Please work, please work, please work," I whispered, afraid to open my eyes. What if it doesn't work and on the other side of the door is the same field as here.

"Jeongin," I heard Changbin exhale and carefully opened my eyes. And what I saw brought tears to them.

Nothing. 

Nothing but the exact same damn field as the one we were standing on. "Fuck!" I screamed in desperation and ran my hands through my hair in stress. I started pacing back and forth mumbling things like that it can't be possible and that we'll never see our friends ever again. 

A hand touched my shoulder and a pitying Kai looked into my eyes. "Calm down. You'll find your them again," he said in a warm voice, but I slapped his hand away. I yelled in his face, "No! No! Those two assholes have probably already taken my place and Changbin's! We'll never see them again and there's nothing we can do about that!"

Tears ran down my cheeks. "Fuck fuck fuck," I whispered and started pulling my hair. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to break something. Hitting anything. I wanted to punch anyone in the face, whoever. I just wanted my anger and frustration to go away. I kept pulling my hair until it hurted. I didn't want to be here anymore. In another world or in another body it would have been better. I just didn't want to be me in that moment.

I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I could feel them burning through me. It felt like they were judging me. Maybe they did. "Jeongin-" Changbin tried to calm me down too, but I snapped at him, "Don't talk to me. Leave me alone." I walked away from them a little, trying to get my breathing and my thoughts under control. 

Exhale inhale,

exhale inhale. 

Just like Seungmin showed me. 

Keep breathing.

 Close your eyes and continue to breathe calmly. 

Just like Seungmin taught me. 

Just like Se-

Seungmin.

He was not there. And he won't come back. We won't find him. We won't find anyone. We should give up.

"There's something written on the door," said Bahiyyih, examining the door more closely. I came closer to them again and looked at what was written on the door. 

Only those who really want to leave can go through this door.

"But I want to get out of here! I want to go to the others! You damned door let me go through!" i screamed and kicked the door. "Now, Jeongin, listen to me. You won't get anywhere that way. You can keep yelling and keep banging on the door, but that won't make the situation any better. I know it's frustrating. Everything is frustrating. This whole Situation. But we also managed to break out of the institution. We managed to escape from the government. We've overcome so many things, so we're going to make it. Okay?" Changbin said in a slightly raised but still comforting voice.

"I'm sorry," I murmured, lowering my gaze. "It's okay. I was about to give up when I got separated from you guys, too," the oldest of us said, but I couldn't see the look on his face. I didn't want to look at him. Kai ruffled my hair and said with a smile: "Don't apologize. I've also had moments where I've thrown everything around and screamed because we've been on the road for so long." 

"Yep he broke our only flashlight," Bahiyyih said slightly annoyed but then smiled too. Both their smiles were warm and it looked like they were trying to cheer me up. I tried to smile as well, even though I didn't feel able to.

What would I have done without them? If I hadn't met Kai and Bahiyyih I probably would never have run into Changbin and I would never have found the door on my own and I probably would have just starved to death.

I was grateful that they had accompanied me. "Thank you," I said, smiling wider. And in that moment I could see the eyes of all three widening. Confused, I looked at Changbin, who was pointing his hand at the door I was standing in front of. I slowly turned and looked through it. The field. The field from the other world. My eyes widened as well and I turned back to the others. 

"See that?! Changbin we're getting closer and closer!" Without even thinking about it, I put a foot in the door and walked through it. "I walked through the door! It worked!" I was happy. I was really happy. Almost all the frustration and hassle was gone. 

The next moment, Changbin also shifted his body through the door without any problem. I looked at the two siblings who only smiled. "I think i can trust you a little bit more by now," said the youngest.

 Kai raised his hand and waved to us. "You can do it. Just as we will find Lea," he said and I smiled. "Thank you for deciding to stay the night with me. I wouldn't have made it this far without you." The two waved again and in the next moment the door flew shut by a draft.

"Now all we have to do is find the others," I said and looked up at the orange sky.

Feb 14th 2023