The Surrogate

A starting point

"You were never given away, I could never have given you away, you were taken from us," Holly sounds hurt as she explains but she also feels profoundly guilty. She's trying not to get upset, not while she's feeding Emilia as it would unsettle her and make breastfeeding a little tricky.

Seb keeps his mouth shut but he knows exactly where this question has come from and that's from whatever bullshit her father has probably fed her. He's almost certain that she's been in touch with Matthew and it would partly explain why he'd been in contact with Holly and wanted to see her.

"Dad said...." Imogen stops suddenly, she doesn't want to say too much about him in case it gets anyone else into trouble.

"You've been in touch with Matthew, your real dad?" Holly asks, not missing the mention of him.

"Why didn't you look for me? Why didn't you come back for me?" she asks sadly.

"Did he tell you that we gave you up for adoption? That we didn't want you? Did Matthew tell you this?" Holly tries again.

Imogen looks down at her lap and just shrugs.

"You're not in any trouble Imogen but it's important that you tell us if you've spoken to your dad or not?" Feeling like he's been proved right, Seb can't keep quiet anymore and tries himself.

"What does it matter? He's dead," she huffs with an attitude.

"You've been missing for weeks, a lot of people have been worried and looking for you, especially your mum and your adoptive parents," he replies firmly. He's not at all used to dealing with teenagers, neither himself or Holly are and it worries him that Holly will quickly feel out of her depth. "You're not in any trouble with anyone," he adds, more softly this time, "it's just everyone's been so worried about you."

She lowers her eyes to stare at the floor and starts tapping her foot moodily, wishing that Seb would just leave because usually when someone says she's not in any trouble it means that she is.

"Imogen, I know I owe you an explanation but you were taken from us before you were two years old. I didn't want that to happen and it broke my heart that day, it really did," Holly reaches out and places her hand on her daughters lower arm, "please don't believe what your dad has told you, we never wanted you taken away from us, you were forcibly taken away."

"Can I have a drink of water please?" she asks, using it as an opportunity to get Seb out of the room for a couple of minutes.

He gets up to his feet and nods, "of course, how about something to eat? When did you last eat?"

She shrugs and then asks, "could I have some toast?"

"Of course," he smiles, catching Holly's eyes too, something that makes her look visibly relaxed.

As he wanders off and she's certain that he's gone, Imogen decides to confess, "it was dad who told me that."

"Ok," Holly keeps her voice calm and glances down at Emilia to make sure she's ok, finding that she's dozed off but still suckling. Taking in her little face she suddenly feels a burst of intense love and it makes a lump appear in her throat. She has to keep this sudden rush of emotion in check for now though, she needs to focus on Imogen at this moment.

"When I turned thirteen my mum and dad decided I was old enough to know that I was adopted, I kind of already knew as I look nothing like either of them. I got them to tell me who my real parents were and I spent a while looking for both of you online," she pauses as Emilia suddenly begins to grizzle.

Holly unclips the other side of her bra and delicately turns Emilia round, making her protest for a few seconds until she latches on again. She's definitely a hungry baby and it makes Holly fear that breast feeding might not be enough and that she might have to supplement with formula. Then it dawns on her that she's thinking about feeding the baby more herself than she is Seb doing it and that makes her realise that she's automatically slipping into a life here, a new life. Will Imogen want to be part of that life too? She hopes so.