Controlled

Chapter 21: Stone

                                          Fall

It's been eighty days since Hammer was killed, eighty-one days since I woke up shot in the hospital to Ms. Moore. It was sixty days ago the doctor said I was ok to go back to work for desk duties, which was the same day Ashley came for the summer to visit.

Now I'm staring down at my phone looking at the date - September twenty-second. Damn, the summer feels like it flew by, and almost without a trace of it ever being here. I wouldn't have believed it was here if I hadn't felt the heating melting my ass every time I stepped outside.

"So what are you going to do?" My head snaps up staring at the woman that has been my constant these last weeks. June is standing at the counter pouring her morning coffee. I can't remember a time that I'd gotten to the kitchen before her.

It was quiet when I got out of bed this morning - quiet and cold not normal for this time of the year since we are just one day away from fall. When I got out of bed the house was eerily quiet like I was alone in some twilight light zone or something. When I walked to the kitchen my feet which are normally warm were cold.

I know I sound crazy but I felt off. Not the normal off that I started feeling eighty days ago - no this was something different. I feel like I should be doing something. What - I don't know, but I felt like all I needed to do was pick one of the many doors in this large house and find out the answers behind the lucky door. Maybe then I could find out why my life now feels so unfulfilled.

"Do about what?" I ask standing and walking over to the other side of the kitchen island.

June starts pulling two plates out of the warmer. She eyes me skeptically before she slides one of the plates over to me. I look down at the plate and back up at her. I have to wonder what time the cook makes it here every morning because I've been up earlier than normal. I'm positive the morning light was not shining when I sat down at the table.

"About the wedding?" She asks right before she takes a bite out of the egg white spinach omelet. The question catches me off guard because of course I know whose wedding she's talking about, but we haven't spoken about her since the day she walked out of the hospital.

"Who's wedding?" I ask fanning innocent.

"You know... Ms. Moore's. It's been the talk of the town, at least that's what I hear. So I know if I've heard about. You've heard about it," She smiles that all-knowing smile that most mothers give to their children. However, the smile is not normal on the woman I should call mom. It is so uncommon that I just stare at her with the deer in the headlights look. She waves her hand dismissing my look of pure shock. "Don't look at me like that. I know you were sitting in here thinking about it." She sips her coffee. "I'm surprised that you haven't done anything...grand." She smiles again.

Now I'm confused. Who is the woman? I have to be in the twilight zone. "Something like what?" I ask when I finally get my thoughts back in working order from the distraction of that smile and this conversation.  "What am I supposed to do...storm the castle and save the princess?" I ask, rolling my eyes. "Talk of the town. Who the hell talks like that? It's like we're back in the nineties."

"Well-" June shrugs. "I thought you were romantic."

"You have been reading too many romance books or something. She made her mind up - well her parents made her mind up. But she is willing to sleep in the bed that was made for her, so now she has to lay in it. There's nothing that I haven't said to convince her that she should make her mind up about what she should or shouldn't be doing about her life."

"I just feel like you could have done more - said more to convince her you are who she should be with. It's like you just gave up," She states. "I saw the way you both were together. It was liking looking at your father and me." She brushes the loose strains of her hair that have fallen from her messy bun from her face. "Did you ever tell her you loved her?"