ALWAYS BEEN THERE: A Lloyd Hansen Story

chapter sixteen

"You're not pregnant. But you do have a uti."

I looked at lloyd. He shook his head, hiding a smile.

"Then why did that pregnancy test say I was?"

"False positive. But the blood and urine test came back negative. You're fine. You and your husband can relax."

I didn't have the courage to correct her.

"Well. Thank you." I whispered. I got off the medical table.

"Thanks." Lloyd said.

I nodded.

Lloyd led me out. "At least I have a uti. Never been more happy for a uti."

"Oh god. Let's get you some meds and go home."

The thought of me being pregnant scared the shit out of me. Lloyd and I would not be fit parents.

"Hey..let's wait until you're a married woman before I get you pregnant."

"That sounds like an affair." I said.

He smirked. "You're okay though?"

I nodded. Lloyd smirked and kissed my cheek.

"Let's go home and drink to celebrate our lack of a child."

•••

Suzanne sat with me in the kitchen. "So you're not pregnant? One hundred percent?"

"One hundred percent not pregnant." I said as I sipped on my wine.

"Wow. But a uti."

I shook the pills that sat next to me. "I should pee more often."

She laughed. "Yes. I don't wanna be an auntie."

"Oh whatever." I said.

She smirked. "But seriously. If you and Lloyd had a kid, do you think you could do it?"

I laughed. "No. We're not even...I don't know what we are. No."

"But besides your relationship. Like do you think you could be a mother and he could be a father?"

"Probably yeah. I mean we both might be dog shit at it. And I don't think I could give up drinking or smoking right now."

"Are you happy here?" Suzanne asked.

"It's different. I mean I like the mansion and the job is okay. But I keep telling Lloyd that I'm still angry or haven't forgiven and I'm not angry and I have forgiven. And I really really love him and I hate that I do. I mean I spent four years trying to get over him, just to bounce back and forgive him in six months. It's like I'm on a leash. The second I go too far I'm pulled back in."

Suzanne nodded.

"Would you marry him?"

"If he asked yeah. But marriage feels different. Like I do love him but we've never even dated. He says he's scared of commitment and jumps to the hardest one. and sometimes I feel like we're still just roommates that use each other for sex. I don't know. Like we don't sleep in the same room at all no matter what. He doesn't give me aftercare. He will sometimes do little things like make me dinner or clean up or something. But I am reaching for those moments. I can't have that and have his last name. And I think he wants kids eventually but what little kid wants to see mommy and daddy say I love you to each other but sleep in separate rooms and have a steady work relationship and that's it? It sucks."

"Why haven't you told him this?"

"Because I am scared that if I say one thing, it's back to him leaving me and bringing girls in to fuck so loud that I cry myself to sleep."

Lloyd

I stood in the corridor, listening. I knew it was wrong and I shouldn't be.

But after she said the last thing, I walked upstairs. I took off my shirt and pants, throwing on some sweatpants.

I walked back downstairs and went to the kitchen.

"Ew Lloyd put a shirt on." Suzanne said as I looked through the cupboard.

"Oh yeah. No." I said.

Camille looked at me before looking away to keep her eyes from trailing. Mhm.

"Okay. This has been a day and I'm tired and tipsy. So goodnight." Camille said.

"Night Cammie." I said. I watched her walk away before looking at suzanne.

"Will you quit trying to butt into our relationship?"

"Your lack of one? God Lloyd. Fucking take her out on a date! She has literally followed you across the world and you can visibly tell that her wall is crumbling. From this new job to you treating her like a sex toy to almost getting her pregnant?"

I sighed. "Fine. Whatever."

"I am dead fucking serious though if you hurt her again there will be a bullet in your head."

"That's great so now you're threatening to kill me."

"No Lloyd. I'm warning you about her. She's turned just as psychotic as you and you should be worried."

"No she hasn't."

Suzanne pulled up security footage on her phone of that same guy she brought home. The one that went too far during sex. She killed him.

"Jesus."

"She's going after too many people that have wronged her. She's been asking me for whereabouts of Darrin. If you don't pull your act together you're next."

"Okay well she has to stop."

"Who is she seeing it from?"

I sighed and nodded.

"Fine. I'm gonna go up and ask her out."

I walked upstairs, finding Cam looking out on her balcony. I went outside with her, wrapping my arms around her from behind.

She tensed but immediately relaxed.

"I hear you. I see you. I wanted to ask if you would be official with me."

She nodded. I kissed her head. Her body warmth helped with the chilly air.

"This is new territory for me though." I said. She nodded.

"Thank you." She whispered. I kissed her temple, sighing. She moved to look at me, turning her body all the way. She was so short pressed against me.

I leaned down and kissed her gently. She melted. I loved that.

"You can act excited." I whispered. She did cute little steps.

"You asked me after all these years asshole." She said happily.

I smiled and kissed her again.

"And I do love you. And I'm not using you for sex. I'm just nervous around you."

She smiled. "Yeah right. You're not nervous."

I kissed her again. "Never know sunshine."

She smirked. "Thank you." She whispered. She kissed me one more time.

Shit.