The Alpha's Mate (Unedited)

Part 41

I could only stare at the gaping jaws of the mine entrance, the jaws that had merely moments ago swallowed my mortal enemy. And even though I knew rationally that it wasn't my fault - if anything, it was hers - I could not prevent the tidal wave of guilt from ravaging my brain as I struggled to comprehend what had just happened. One thought chimed louder than the rest; I could've prevented it. If I had just waited for Luna or not been so reckless as to lunge at Amy in the first place, she may still be here now. But now her death could be hanging over my head - sure, I didn't like her, but nobody deserved to die. Did it now make me a murderer? Would I be imprisoned?

I edged closer to the mine shaft entrance, which had widened considerably following its collapse. The ground trembled slightly under my weight but held still and I peeked over the lip of the hole. An impenetrable darkness met my gaze, draining any shred of hope still alive inside of me. I peered down but could barely distinguish anything further down than the first couple of metres. I mouthed Amy's name, my voice barely a whisper and it echoed loudly, sounding as if the mine itself was alive with snakes. Alarmed, I croaked Amy's name again on a more audible level, to block out the hissing. The echoes died down and I strained to listen.

Silence.

I remained there, murmuring Amy's name until I heard people approach and strong, warm arms wrap me into a tight, caring embrace, tugging me away from the entrance. I sighed, relaxing against him for a moment or to on instinct, before I remembered to think and then wiggled out of his hug. He met my eyes, his gleaming with an unnecessary apology.

"Don't" I whispered "I don't deserve it"

This seemed to ignite an anger in him and his eyes blazed as he embraced me again.

"This is not your fault!" he declared, angrily "Luna told me what happened. I'm sorry we were too late."

You weren't. I was too early.

I let the thought reverberate through my brain.

I refused to hug him back and he cupped my chin in his hands, forcing me to stare at him.

"Don't push me away" he pleaded, his voice soft and gentle. My traitorous heart dissolved and I felt my head nod and pull him back to me. I didn't deserve him. I didn't deserve to be reassured - but I couldn't torture him because of my mistakes.

A few of the stronger males were inspecting the mine shaft, sniffing the air and testing the edge of the mine. I notice Luna approach us, smiling sadly and felt my heart sink further. Why was everyone being so nice? I didn't deserve sympathy.

"What happened?" she asked.

"I suggested that we both push back at the same time and use our weights to propel us both back to our respective sides. She did it too early, hoping her side would support her and I would be too surprised to resist. Her plan backfired"

As I spoke the words, the guilt eased a fraction. It dawned on me that she had been happy enough to subject me to possible death at the chance of freeing herself yet here I was mourning her because her plan had gone wrong - hideously so. The thought didn't completely erase my guilt but I felt a sudden justification at being the survivor, out of the pair of us. I hadn't intentional caused her death whereas, if her plan had worked, she would've been fully responsible for mine.

I watched as the searching werewolves exchanged head shakes and slowly retreated from the mine entrance. It didn't look good on the 'Amy being alive' front. I allowed Rafael to hold me and I barely noticed him bundle me into a bridal style cradle and begin sprinting in the direction of the pack mansion. I noticed that it only took half an hour to return whereas it had taken me days to wander to this specific point - in some distant part of my brain, I realized I must've been stumbling in a large circular arc and Amy's pack had been closer to our home than I'd originally anticipated. That, or Rafael's speed had increased. Tenfold - which seemed unlikely.

I peeped up long enough to locate Luna with my eyes and called her over. I signalled for Rafael to put me down and he reluctantly set me on my feet, his eyes remaining firmly on me. I smiled at him and fell in pace with Luna.

"So - you coming back home?" I enquired, trying to make my voice sound as casual as possible although it killed me to think she might not. I added "I missed you."

She glanced up at me as I said the last sentence and I saw her dark green eyes glistening with emotion.

"I missed you, too. And you'll always be my best friend." she replied quietly. I tried to smile but something about her words sounded final and confident. I leaned in closer, concerned.

"You're not coming back, are you?" I said gently and I sensed her avoiding my gaze.

"Not...just yet. There's too many painful memories back at the mansion and I need to go solo-wolf for a while" she pieced together her words delicately. I nodded. I couldn't deny her that. It would be selfish to convince her to stay because I would miss her.

"We can move if it wi-" I started.

"No. But thanks, Keira. And I'll visit. Regularly"

"You better" I joked, my voice breaking slightly at the end from emotion. We both paused simultaneously and laughed, hugging each other tightly. I gestured for Rafael and the others to continue on without us, Rafael shooting me a 'I'm-here-if-you-need-me' kinda look before jogging after the others and I knew he'd heard every single word we'd said. I felt a tear trickle down my face and slip onto Luna's shoulder.

"I better go now - I can't risk going near the house" she said, laughing shakily.

"So soon? I can come with you if you want" I offered, desperate to cling onto my best friend but she shook her head immediately.

"No. You're need here - you're the alpha female - and besides, it sounds like Rafael's been a wreck without you. He needs you" and I knew as she said the words, that they were true. But it didn't stop me from feeling a cavern open in my heart at the thought of her leaving. I hadn't realized how close we'd grown from our time together.

"Where will you go?" I asked and she shrugged, her eyes sparkling slightly.

"Wherever the wind takes me. Being bound to...Kellan" it obviously took her a lot of effort to say his name out loud "for so long and the pack, it feels nice to be able to do and go where I want." and I noticed her eyes sparkle slightly at the prospect of freedom and adventure.

"Be safe. Goodbye, Luna" I said.

"I will. Goodbye, Keira"

And then she was gone, kicking up a flurry of leaves in her wake, her werewolf speed making her little more than a blur, even to my enhanced eyesight. I stood there silently for a few moments, overcome with sadness at her absence. I felt as though my head had been on a constant roller coaster today and my mind was still reeling. Composing myself, I walked at a leisurely pace back towards the mansion. After a few minutes, I felt Rafael come up behind me.

"I said to go ahead without me!" I sniffled, wiping my nose and trying to hide my puffy, red face from crying. He chuckled.

"And waste another precious moment away from you? I missed you. Being apart made me realize how much I've come to...love you" he murmured in my ear as his arms snaked around my waist. I twisted round to face him, unable to keep the smile off my face. He said he loved me.

"I missed you too and, I think that...I might just love you too"

As I muttered those words, his eyes lit up brighter than a thousand kilowatt light bulb and he gazed at me with pure wonder, hugging me slightly to hard with his alpha strength. His elation being infectious, I didn't complain, just happy to be in his arms again. Never thought I'd ever say that.

"I thought I'd never hear you say that" he said joyfully, stroking my hair out my eyes tenderly. I realized I was still filthy from our week-long 'hiking' trip and blushed, using my fingers to comb hastily through my hair in an attempt to look slightly less than a tramp.

"There's no need. You're beautiful, just the way you are"

And with that - the woods alive with the sound of wildlife and sun streaming through the trees - he bent down and kissed me with an unbearable sweetness on the lips.

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Phoar!!

Just the epilogue to go now!!!

:)