ꗃ﹕❜ Minerva ❯❯ A review shop [2.0]

×. ❜Area 51 ! Review 2! [Rev. Cey]

Book Name: Area 51

Author: -1-800-3RACHA-

Reviewer: ceyshells

Cover: 2/5

Background material shows a clear link to the story and the titular character is depicted. However, the overall design of the cover itself is lacking due to its simplicity. The font style is a bit stark in contrast to the rest of the cover. Overall, the look of this cover is average: not bad, but nothing special.

The main issue that I have with this cover is its link with the synopsis. There is no feature of Maria in the cover, and there is no mention of Minho in the synopsis. It is as though the cover is giving away too much in terms of the story, much like spoilers.

Title: 1/5

I appreciate the title for being blatantly obvious about its topic and link to the story, but it is an overused one that isn't unique.

Synopsis: 5/10

A decent length, not so short that it lacks information, but also not too long that it gives away too much. Unfortunately, the grammar was off at a couple of points, mainly in the form of run-on sentences. Those occur in the last paragraph. One way to notice run-on sentences is by reading out loud. If it feels rushed or has an awkward rhythm, you might consider adding a comma or breaking them into two sentences. I also think you slightly misunderstand the use of semicolons. For the first two paragraphs, I would have used a colon instead of a semicolon. Eg. Area 51: / Maria Cascone: .

Similar to what I mentioned in the cover section, there is no mention of Minho.

Execution: 7/10

Honestly, the story is quite well written as I appreciate stories that I can follow easily. However, despite being able to follow the story easily, I would prefer if it gave me something to think about. Perhaps there is some wow factor because the book is about the unknown, but everything in the book is so thoroughly stated that I don't feel excitement.

Plot: 18/20

The story is written in a very systematic way, where each event is elaborated a lot on and continues onto the next easily. There are no flashbacks or different point of views other than the bonus chapter. This is great from a reader's perspective because they know that the story is focused on one character and solely on that character as the main.

In terms of content, there is a fair amount of action, but as the story moves on, I believe the violence will diminish slightly.

Writing Style: 13/20

Not entirely sure if this belongs under writing styles, but it fits better here than the other categories, so I shall. I'd like you to read the first paragraph of the first chapter, not even that far into the story, and take note of the first word of each sentence.

There are five sentences in this paragraph, 3 beginning with "I", and 2 beginning with "the". The start of each sentence does not vary, which leads to a repetitive sound. If this is repeated throughout the book, a reader could get bored.

I understand that those two words are good to start sentences with as they are easy to use and can link to the actions or descriptions better, but like what I've mentioned, they can be overused easily. One way I use to solve this is by ensuring every sentence starts with a different word. In this way, there is no chance of the same starting word appearing. However, if this isn't possible, try to separate the sentences that use that same starting word.

Other than this, the story is descriptive in its settings and actions.

Grammar & Vocabulary: 12/20

In terms of grammar, the story is well written. There are instances, however, where there is missing punctuation or the wrong usage of tense. The missing punctuation is mainly commas, which lead to run-on sentences. To rectify this, try reading it out loud. This helps you to notice where a pause should be made.

Here's an easy example that I picked out from the first chapter:

"See you in hell Scott,"
(when addressing someone at the end of a dialogue, there is a pause before saying the name)
Edited: "See you in hell, Scott,"

Overall, I do not have much to touch on in this aspect, but do take note of the ones I mentioned above.

Vocabulary wise, there are occasionally some interesting word choices. Otherwise, most of the story is written simply.

Character Development: 6/10

Where the story is published thus far, I have only been introduced to Maria as a main character. Every other character encountered has a minor role and not much about them is stated. Therefore, I will be focusing on Maria as a character to analyze.

She's a ruthless person, willing to kill and willing to torture. Based on the first chapter torture scene, she seems to have a short fuse in terms of anger, seen when she kills her captive whom she was interrogating. She also has a tendency to resort to sarcasm in certain situations, especially when she feels she is seen as beneath whom she is speaking to.

Maria also holds a lot of pride, and does not hesitate in talking down those she feels are lacking. However, despite her outward appearance, she does have feelings. She was able to express mild fear on the way to her new mission location, despite saying otherwise when asked.

In terms of skills, she is very analytical in a negative way, thinking up many outcomes of her mission, even some in which she fails. She likely also has a good memorization skill, as she had to remember all the mission details within one truck ride.

Yeosang is a friend of Maria's since young, when both their parents were killed. Along the way, he develops a crush on her and was heartbroken to know that she would be away for years due to the mission. Although only one chapter has been written from his perspective, the reader has an insight into his feelings.

For Maria, there is a fair amount of character description and development, but other than Yeosang, there is not much information thus far on other characters.

Total: 64/100

Additional: Hello @-1-800-3RACHA- , thank you for giving me the opportunity to review your work. I had a good time reading it, and I hope you will use what I've stated above to improve your book. Feel free to pm me for any clarifications.