Against the dark Hearts

Chapter 52

I stare at him in shock. It's as if I'm looking into the face of a ghost.

"Hello, Elisabeth Darling," he whispers, placing his hand under my chin to lift it. I have no idea how to react. I don't even know if I should react. Is this reality, or have I stared at the mirror so many times that the images I see there now appear before my eyes?

"Or should I call you Professor Hawkins now?" he asks, leaning down towards me. I am trapped in his grip. I am trapped in his eyes. He touches me so gently that it's barely noticeable, yet it feels like he has bound me. My heart starts beating faster. A younger version of me stirs in my soul, screaming for me to close the distance between us. She is incredibly loud in my head, and my heart is incredibly loud in my chest. How can she still be alive? Underneath the rubble that is called my past? Why does she stir beneath the pain? I know she shouldn't, but she is just so strong. Too strong for me.

Sebastian's eyes have changed, but they are not entirely unfamiliar to me. The color, the rich, dark green, is just as vibrant and captivating as before. The voice grows louder, screaming things I haven't thought about in a long time. I want to give in. I want to feel his breath on my cheek and his body pressed against mine. I am trapped in a delirium. This must simply be a dream. It can't be real. It just can't be true.

If it's true, then this is not good. If it's the truth, then he's alive and safe and doing well, and there's no good explanation for it. No explanation that is plausible or forgivable. How can it be?

How can he be doing well? Why does he seem untouched and healthy? The last time I saw him, he was dragged away. He was grabbed by the collar and rendered harmless. I saw it clearly. Her hand on the fabric. His disheveled hair even more chaotic than usual. His expressionless face as all paths to a good future were blocked for him. I saw it. Every little detail, and yet here he stands, looking downright perfect.

"This can't be real," I whisper, and his reaction is a mixture of incredulous smirk and a raised eyebrow. He smiles crookedly. His smile always used to melt me. How can it be that he's here, smiling? Where has he been for the past seven years?

"I may look dreamy, but I'm definitely real," he replies. I pull my chin back so he no longer touches me and take a step back.

"I... why?" I ask, my question hangs incomplete between us, and I don't know how to finish it. Why are you still alive? Why didn't you reach out? Why are you here? Why do you look as if nothing happened? Where were you? Who are you now?

He still smiles at me. The sun shines through the stained glass windows, bathing his face in a beautiful afternoon light. His freckles stand out in the light, and his dark green eyes sparkle.

"I'm replacing Professor Hecat while she fulfills her ministry assignment. After all, I was one of the best in Defense Against the Dark Arts back then," he says. So that's why he's here, the question of why has been answered.

But the remaining questions will have to wait because I hear my classroom starting to fill up. My sixth graders are here.

"I need to start my class," I say, reaching for my wand and my notebook. I gesture towards the door, and he looks at me with confusion, but then nods as if he understood.

He leaves my office but waits outside the room, observing my students as I step out. The students whisper as they see us together. I already know that there will be rumors.

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Sallow," I say loudly, and the whispering subsides. "We were in the same year when we were students," I add, looking sternly at a group of Gryffindor girls who are dreamily gazing at Sebastian. Yes, he still has that effect on them.

"If I'm not mistaken, he can introduce himself to all of you in your next class, but for now, we need to say goodbye to Professor Sallow," I say, looking meaningfully at him, and he nods briefly.

As he walks gracefully through the room, I watch him. His stride is confident, no trace of boyishness or shyness. I have to tear my gaze away.

My students start whispering again as he exits the door, and it's difficult to calm them down. Unfortunately, it doesn't work at all. Especially the girls are more than just distracted by the new teacher, and I understand them perfectly.

In the following days, I try to keep myself occupied whenever I'm alone so that I don't think too much about him, but it's Sebastian. He's always there when I don't need him. I realize how much I haven't gotten over him. Seven years, and I haven't been able to move on from a teenage love.

It bothers me so much that I fly to Feldcroft over the weekend. The house is peacefully situated in the countryside. It is a little further across from Sebastian's old house and surrounded by a wooden fence. Wildflowers grow along the fence, and there's a table with three chairs outside. A dark blond man sits on one of the chairs with a little blonde girl on his lap. The girl playfully pats his face, and he laughs. A blonde woman comes out of the house, levitating a jug of iced tea and a few glasses in front of her.

I walk leisurely towards them and am embraced in a gentle hug as Evangeline sees me. Ominis stands up, and he too envelops me in a warm hug, holding his daughter in his arms. Elisa wraps her arms around my neck and hangs onto me. She's two years old, and I'm not the strongest, so I sit down with her on my lap.

"Beb," she says as she strokes my auburn curls.

Evangeline pours me a glass of iced tea. I take a sip. We talk about the past week. Evangeline mentions that Elisa flew on a broom for the first time. I still don't dare mention Sebastian. Maybe they already know, and they don't know how to bring up the topic.

Elisa babbles something that I can barely understand, but she sounds adorable. Ominis talks about the current topics at the Ministry. I hardly pay attention. The events of 1899 have caused a lot of work. My best student, Albus Dumbledore, was involved in an issue that gave the Ministry a lot of headaches. The matter is hardly known, and only those within the Ministry have precise information. Ominis wasn't allowed to say much more than that. I don't want to know the details. What the students do after their graduation is not my concern, no matter how bad it may be.

I have to focus on my own business.

"How has the classes been so far? Anything exciting happened?" Evangeline asks, looking at me with concern. How can I say it? Do they know? If they don't know, how will Ominis react? Evangeline looks at me with furrowed eyebrows when I don't respond immediately. I know she's trying to read my mind, but I've become skilled in Occlumency. Even if she catches snippets, they don't mean anything to her.

"Stop that," I say sternly, and she looks at me apologetically. "Forgive me, you just look like you're having nightmares again," she replies.

If only they were just dreams.

I look at her seriously. "Take Elisa," I say, and Evangeline takes her daughter from my lap. "Bring her inside and have Hillo watch over her," my tone has changed. I don't know how they'll react when I tell them. Ominis, in particular, is unpredictable in that regard. Hillo is the house-elf of Ominis and Evangeline. She knows Elisa and can take care of her.

When Evangeline returns, I nervously tap my leg. I gesture for her to sit down. It's better if she's sitting.

She looks at me with worry, almost full of fear. I know his name can trigger something. Evangeline feels guilty because Sebastian ended up in Grimward's clutches only because we saved her. At least that's what she thinks. His return could bring anything to the surface.

"I have something to tell you, and I want you to try to stay calm," I say.

Ominis looks impatiently in my direction, in the direction from which my voice is coming. Evangeline reaches for his hand.

"Elisabeth, just spit it out," Ominis snaps impatiently.

I nibble on my fingernails and stare at my hands. The words slowly detach from my tongue and come out more like a croak.

"Sebastian is back."