07 || simple and sweet
I danced around my room with a broom in my hand, sweeping as I moved to the beat of the music blaring from my speakers. It was finally friday and I had nothing better to do, so why not clean up now so i'm free to go when alexis comes up with some plan. the song I was currently humming to was coming to an end and after a few seconds long pause as long as you love me by justin bieber came on shuffle.
for a second I contemplated skipping it, but I hadn't heard it in a while and as soon as justin began to sing I was screaming out the lyrics, singing along with him. the floor was already clean, but I continued using the broom as a prop and when big sean's part came around, I got really into it. my throat cleared and the handle to the broom was positioned and used as a microphone.
half way through the rap the bedroom door opened, revealing a really tall Shawn Mendes. my heart practically fell to my ass and the broom fell over to the ground, my body following behind in fear. my bum met the ground and I was panting almost heavily, an amused expression plastered on his face.
"shawn!" I whined loudly, tossing a book near by at him.
he easily caught it then threw it onto my bed with a shy smile on his face. I sighed as I ran my fingers through my hair and reached my hand out for him to grab. he pulled me up from the ground then pinched my cheek.
"that was quite the show."
my cheeks were most likely fifty shades of red because they were burning.
"who let you in?" I breathed out then held my temples in embarrassment. sensing how uncomfortable I was he grinned, the grin that got me every time and made me feel everything I couldn't describe. a blaze of emotions that couldn't be touched or expressed.
I kindly returned the smile then looked down at what I was wearing. fuck.
duck covered pajama bottoms? love it, the kid hasn't truly seen me in days and when he finally does i'm in this. "I-I.."
don't you dare stutter again.
"i'm gonna..I'm gonna go change, i'll be right back."
with that being said I hurried to the bathroom, grabbing a pair of black jeans on my way. moments later I was finally changed and presentable. my hair was tied up into a effortless bun and I stole a couple minutes to apply some mascara and chapstick. I looked in the mirror then huffed.
when I walked out shawn wasn't in sight. I took a couple steps more into the bedroom and out the bathroom, he then coming into view. He was at the corner of my bedroom with my guitar. he looked pretty lost in it, his fingers tugging at a few strings, playing a tune much better than mine, one that was good enough to actually be titled a tune. the music was shut off and it was just him trying to figure the instrument out as he sat on my bed, his tongue caught between his lips in concentration.
I didn't want to ruin this moment for him or interrupt what he was doing. I wanted to continue watching him, allowing him to get lost and infatuated with the thing that in the end had no meaning to someone. shawn liked music, it was his passion if I'm remembering his words correctly. this was him connecting with his passion in my bedroom with my guitar. It made me smile for some reason and I felt happy watching him. each time his little tune came out well he'd smile genuinely.
"do you have one? at home?" I asked, unsure in the beginning as I mumbled out the words while still debating wether to interrupt the moment.
his head snapped towards me and his cheeks turned a rosy color, his hand dropping to his lap and other gripping the neck of the guitar, gently placing it back where it was.
"no!" I practically yelled, my hands reaching out signaling him to stop. "you can use it, keep playing." I smiled then hurried over to the bed, landing on my stomach after plopping down on it. he watched my movements with a faint smile on his face then back to the guitar and picked it back up, setting it onto his lap.
"you didn't tell me you had a guitar." he said as he looked down at it. I fiddled with my fingers then parted my lips to speak.
"I never had the chance. I got it after we spent that day at the woods, besides, you didn't say a word to me at school for the rest of the week." I stated, but he chuckled at my words then looked over at me.
"two player game, scar. I can't start all the conversations."
he was right, I depended on him to make things happen between us.
I only shrugged then turned over so I was laying on my side, facing him. his attention was on the guitar and his fingers were strumming that same tune from before filling the room.
"my brother gave it to me because someone gave it to him. they apparently didn't need it anymore and it no longer served a purpose." I shrugged. shawn shook his head at my words, his eyes never leaving the instrument.
"take it." I said. as soon as the words left my mouth his head shot up and he was looking me in the eyes with a confusion and surprise in his eyes.
"what?" he blinked.
"I said take it. they might've not had a purpose for the thing, but you do." before he could open his mouth and protest to be polite I continued. "I don't play guitar, you're the music geek, right?"
he laughed softly then reached over to poke my stomach making me giggle. "Geek? Thanks, Scar."
I quickly shook my head and gave him a sympathetic look. "I didn't mea-"
"I know, I'm only playing around. why are you always so.." he struggled to find a word which made my stomach turn, afraid of what would follow his last words.
"like nervous around me? I know I'm cute, but.."
I quickly shook my head then shoved his back, pushing him forward a little. the heat rose to my cheeks yet again and I was mortified. sure, Shawn was cute, but that wouldn't be the reason behind my constant struggle with words, stutters, and silence. It was the fact I lacked experience in being the social kind of girl who easily made friends and knew all the right words.
"you aren't even that cute and that isn't it! have you ever seen me with anyone other than alexis?" I protested.
he nodded his head lightly and thought about what I just said. my guitar, his, guitar was placed back where it was and he pushed himself further back onto the bed then rested on his back beside me. he placed his arms behind his head then finally spoke after a minute of silence.
"sammy."
my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. the only time he had seen me with Sammy was back at the party and it was for an about two words exchanged conversation.
"I don't hang with sammy. I learned his name the day of the party."
he chewed at his bottom lip before he spoke. "I've seen you..never mind, I have to head home. I have an exam tomorrow." he stood up from the bed then reached over to grab his flannel that laid at the bottom of my bed. I hadn't noticed he took it off, didn't know he even wore one.
just a few minutes ago I felt at ease and now I just feel saddened and anxious, like I usually do. I didn't want him to go yet. Whenever shawn was around I felt okay. most of my worries vanished, the worry of doing or saying something stupid that would ruin this friendship being the only worry left. there was always those nerves, but it felt nice. I felt alive.
"good luck." I said lowly then sent him a weak smile when his eyes met mine as he stood at my door, ready to walk out. he returned it then shut the door behind him, but a few seconds later he was back.
"forgot something."
"you didn't bring anything..?" I searched the bed for what he could have possibly left, soon feeling his hand placed on my shoulder tugging it so I was facing him. he leaned in and wrapped his arms around me for a tight hug. this caught me by surprise, but I wasted no time in hugging him back.
"thank you, for the guitar I mean." he said after pulling away from the hug. I nodded in response and this time he really left.
