Kaylee Jaymie Halstead

Worried about dad

TW: Self Harm

Will pov
It's been a couple weeks and I've been getting worried about Jay. I had just finished the Night Shift and went to jays. I put my key in the door and walked in. The tv was still on and the dishes hadn't been washed. I walked upstairs when I saw Kaylee asleep outside Jays door. I shook her awake.
Kaylee: hmm
Will: what are you doing out here? Why aren't you in your bed?
Kaylee: dad
Will: what's going on trouble talk to me?
Kaylee: it's bad again. He won't eat. He doesn't come out. It's like that day over again. What if he doesn't make it through this time? He pushed Hailey away so she's staying with Kim
Will: I'm gonna help him trouble
Kaylee: I can't lose him Uncle Will. I can't
She broke down crying and I sat down beside her giving her a hug.
Will: why don't you wait for me downstairs and put a movie on?
She went downstairs and I knocked on jays door
Will: Jay come on I'm worried about you
Jay: I can't will. I can't do it
Will: open the door so we can talk
Jay: I messed up will I I did it again. I promised but I fucked it up. I gave in
I knew straight away what he was talking about and my heart broke. He was doing so well
Jay: I'm sorry will. I didn't mean to. It was the only way. I felt stuck. I felt like I had to. I deserve it Will
Will: open the door Jay
Jay: I can't
Will: why not Jay?
Jay: you're gonna stop me
Will: Jay please open the door. I just want to make sure you're okay
I waited for a few minutes and he slowly opened the door. I walked in and his room was all smashed up and there was dry blood over the sheets and on a few clothes.
Will: oh Jay
He sat on the edge of the bed and I sat beside him.
Will: let me see
Jay: No
Will: Jay let me see
Jay: No you're gonna be mad and I don't want you to be. I let you down. I let you both down
Will: hey Jay just listen. I'm not mad okay. I'm worried about you. We're both worried about you. You've not been yourself Jay. Let me clean them
He was thinking about it. He looked down and held out his arm. His forearm was littered in cuts. How did I not know things were getting this bad?
Will: Jay you need to start talking. Shutting yourself away is trapping you with your thoughts.
Jay: it's hard. I don't know how to.
Will: I know it's hard but you need to talk to someone Jay. You're my little brother and I love you more than anything. You've got a girl downstairs who's worried about you and afraid that you're gonna do something and she'll lose another person she loves.
I got up and grabbed the first aid kit from his bathroom. I sat back beside him and placed his arm on my lap.
Will: it's gonna sting but I'm gonna be as quick as I can
I took some antiseptic wipes and began wiping the cuts
Jay: ah shit
Will: I know I'm sorry
After I cleaned his cuts I bandaged his arm.
Will: are there any more?
He put his head down
Will: it's okay just show me. I'm not disappointed I promise
He pulled his short leg up and he had a few on his thigh. I cleaned it and put a covering over it.
Jay: I'm sorry
Will: hey it's okay.
He put his head on my lap and I ran my fingers through his hair
Jay: I wish mom was here right now.
Will: I know. just know she's looking down on us and she's in our hearts.
Jay: I'm really sorry will. I didn't mean for it to get this bad.
Will: what brought all this back?
Jay: thinking about brandon and the accident. I've been off my meds for a while and the nightmares and flashbacks are getting worse.
Will: why you not taking them jay?
Jay: I just want to be normal. I don't want to have to take stupid pills just to have a normal mind.
Will: Jay you need to take them. They stop you from going to this dark place.
Jay: I will I'll take it tomorrow
Will: okay good. Why don't you get some sleep and tomorrows a new day okay
Jay: mhm
Jay took his melatonin and fell asleep. I took all his dirty laundry and put it in the washing basket. I tidied his room and went downstairs where Kaylee was still watching TV
Kaylee: he okay?
Will: he's okay now. He talked and he's feeling better.
Kaylee: did he hurt himself?
Will: I'm not gonna lie to you. He did but we're gonna work through it okay? Together
Kaylee: I knew he was getting bad. I should have said something sooner. It's all my fault. I brought up brandon. I'm sorry uncle Will. Its all my fault
Will: hey trouble listen to me okay. It's not your fault. He stopped taking his medication. He hid it well. Not even I noticed. No one noticed. It's no one's fault okay. I'm gonna get him an appointment with dr Charles and we'll work from there. You wanna go to the firehouse tomorrow?
Kaylee: yeah okay
I could see her fighting sleep.
Will: why don't you get some rest okay.
Kaylee: st-stay
I sat down on the couch and she laid her head on a pillow on my lap. I put a blanket over her and she fell asleep straight away.

The next day
Kaylee pov
I woke up and I was laying on uncle Will.
Uncle Will: morning trouble. Kelly's gonna come and get you in an hour so start getting ready.  I'll come and pick you up after I've taken dad to see dr Charles
I went upstairs and started getting ready. I was doing my hair when zach started FaceTiming me.
Kaylee: hey
Zach: hi. How are you?
Kaylee: I'm alright. You wanna come to the firehouse with me?
Zach: er yeah sure. I have soccer at 5 tho
Kaylee: that's cool. You wanna meet me there or we can pick you up
Zach: can you pick me up because I know that I'd just take my time
Kaylee: I'll be around half an hour
Zach: okay