Shameless - lestappen

11- If the World was Ending

We weren't meant for each other and it's fine
But if the world was ending
You'd come over, right?
You'd come over and you'd stay the night
Would you love me for the hell of it?

- JP Saxe, Julia Michaels

11

Charles Leclerc

The Dutchman has been in my arms for a long time, with his head on my chest. I dare not move, my arms are placed around his shoulders and gently hold him against me.

He holds his arms against him, wiping his eyes and cheeks with his hand, completely surrounded by my embrace.

He slowly relaxes, and from time to time a sob still runs through his body.

I'm not saying anything, my heart beats fast in my rib cage, I've never been this close to Verstappen, physically.

I feel that he calms down and I decide to break the silence. I scrape my throat before I speak timidly.

"Are you feeling a little better?"

A new sob runs through the driver's body, surprising me. I hear him sniffing and breathing rattling with tears.

"Please don't let go of me. "

My heart serves, the voice of verstappen is full of distress and fear.

At that moment I think only of the pain and anguish of the man in my arms and I almost forget the reasons why I hate him.

"I'm not going to do it."

He nods his head gently.

I feel his back trembling under my hands and arms. Probably a mixture of tiredness and fear.

Slowly, without really thinking, I begin to move my hands on his shoulder blades, making small circles with my fingers.

I suddenly realize what I'm doing and quickly stop and squeeze. I don't know what went through my mind.

My cheeks are burning with shame, for having taken so much initiative towards the Dutchman.

I'm still trying to convince myself that I only feel indifference when I'm around him, but my reaction just proved me otherwise.

"Please... don't stop..."

He speaks so softly, his voice is almost pleading.

I don't know why but I do what he tells me and put my hands on his back, gently caressing his skin over his shirt.

I'm not exerting any pressure under my fingers, just touching the skin, aware that he may very well have bruises here as well.

It works, I feel his muscles relax and his breathing calm down.

He's been in my arms for several minutes, but right now I don't care. I'm just trying to figure out what's going on in his life so he ends up like this. I'm trying to figure out where the bruising on his body came from.

I want to know what's going on. I want him to be protected.

He comes up suddenly and raises his face towards me, crossing my gaze.

His blue eyes are red as are his cheeks, covered with a furrow, where all the tears flowed.

I feel a little uncomfortable around here, now that he's looking at me while he's still in my arms.