Stand tall ( BUCKY X READER )

Repercussion worries

She couldn't shake it all from her mind , the events that have unfolded from seeing a ghost from her past , luka's background to  the phoenix and her sacrifice it was like a fever dream in it's highest form .  Even laying in the bed watching the man she loved playing with their child she couldn't help be wary of the good she wanted to enjoy it in all it's glory but what life had taught her the good is followed by the bad .   the repercussion of the phoenix destruction will called to question she sure of it but how will she be able to explain it .   She barely knew to explain it to herself and she also couldn't shake the sadness of it gone either .   " hey mama what's wrong " bucky asked seeing her face contort as it was expressing her thought ." The repercussions of today , i will be called in to question and what if they deem me too dangerous and send me to the raft  and then fact we have child together that someone else carried what if we fall out and then what happens . the fact that the woman used was the woman who tried help me escape as child bucky she was luka's mom too and now she gone , he shot her like he did back then  like she was nothing " she cried her breathe stuck feeling like she couldn't breathe at all .  " doll calm down it ok look i'm going to get bruce " he jumped up and ran out the room as the monitors went made . Not second later bruce calm in telling bucky to stay out of the room running to her side . " what going on kitten "  he asked checking her over. " can't.. breathe... heart .. " she struggled trying to get air to her lungs as her whole body tensed . " its a panic attack i need you to follow my voice kitten i need you to  breathes slowly  inhale.... exhale good  now do it again " bruce rubbed her back as she copied suddenly the air filling her lung and her body relaxing slowly. 

The team and xmen stood outside the room as bucky paced with luka in his arms . " what happened" storm was first to ask . " she was fine one minute then she went quiet then she couldn't breathe  i could hear her heart beat speed up  " he told them face laced with hurt . " she talked about everything she thinks they will locked her up and then she was talking about the woman they used to carry luka   it all happened so fast " he continued .  " panick attack " logan relaxed slightly . " what " nat asked confused ." she used to have them when she came home first  , it's bit more brutal this time you just need to  calm her down she gonna blame herself for everything or look for a worry in things  and if it is like before night terrors are going to happen so just hold her tight and when she wakes give her .. " logan explained being cut off by bucky .  " hot chocolate , she told me that you did that for her when she was younger " he smiled at the memory . " exactly it's long road but i trust you guys to do it  but tell stark i'm staying at compound for a bit " logan pointed . " it's nearly finished in the remodeling but i think he made some extra rooms " nat informed them .  " we have to get back to the school but we will visit as much as we can  " . " professor is coming down later to talk with her it helps  , he knows how to get through to her sometimes  " logan said . " give luka to aunty asha we get him some food " nat cooed to the baby.  " she's ok panic attack , she currently sleeping at the moment " bruce walked out of the room . " i'll keep eye on her  , son you go get something to eat  and sleep a little , she needs you strong " logan turned to bucky.  he hesitated in agreeing but walked with the rest of them as they walked to the cafeteria . 

He watched over her as she slept rubbing her head when her face showed fear easily easing it with his soft touch .  " she been through hell and back so i made sure ross and the big guys above knew the score " fury said taking a seat beside him . " they can't blame her for this " logan growled making her stir but stay sleeping . " they're not strange and wong told the phoenix is gone and that she was safe to be around plus i may have told them if they come for her then they would have more to worry about " nick whispered. " you threatened the government " logan chuckled . " when it comes it comes to her , yeah i did  and in saying that they will watch her closely but she kitten she will show them " he shrugged . " we nearly lost her again " logan sighed . "  we will make sure it last time " nick stood .  he walked over to the sleeping girl and kissed her head . " i gotta get the new documents considering what we know  about  that grandson of yours , lets make it last time we do this kid birth cert ." nick smiled before leaving the room .  " dad " she croaked. " hey kitten you ok " he continued rubbing her head adoration in his eyes as he looked down. "  where bucky and luka " she asked looking around  . " hopefully bucky is sleeping but i doubt it and luka is getting food with nat " he told her . " i seen her again " she stared at the ceiling . " bucky told me " he kissed her hand holding it tightly . " she saved me and gave me luka and now she gone " her voice shaking as her lip trembled .  "they buried her  this morning tony made sure it was taking care of and let her family know " he told her . " they probably thought she was gone forever least it some closure " she tried not cry but she couldn't stop it no matter how hard she tried .  " maybe when you better you can meet with them and tell them she died a hero " logan suggested . " can you get tony to arrange  it as soon as possible " she sat up pleading with her eyes . "  i will i promise " he sighed knowing full well she wouldn't rest . " i heard what uncle nick said  " she spoke up . " yeah he made sure you won't get in trouble , wasn't your doing it was hers  , it was phoenix ". " is it horrible that i miss her " she asked looking in his eyes . " no  of course not you process this all how you want to don't worry  "logan hugged her tightly. " he's finally gone it means we are free " she smiled brightly against his chest . " that we are kid " he let the tear fall down his face .