And Start Over ||SamxBucky||

(chapter 29 Alive)

Bucky leaned his head on Sam's shoulder and Sam did the same to Bucky's shoulder. They stood there, already been standing there just slowly dancing for about five minutes. It didn't feel like it though, it felt as though they were for only one minute. Time flies too quickly, quicker than we all think, even for someone that lives up to be a hundred years old it doesn't matter, because no matter how old you get, it feels like you days, hours, minutes, seconds, pass by so quickly that one day, you just blink and your forty, or fifty, or no matter how old. It sucks, it really does. It hurts Sam knowing that he's getting older and that if bucky does survive- no that when Bucky does make it out of this damn hospital, he's never going to outlive bucky, Sam will die and bucky will outlive him for god knows how long until it's his time to go to. Sam breathed in Bucky's scent, relishing it as he let his head fall on his broad shoulder. Bucky smiled, doing the same as Sam as the just very slightly swayed back and forth, gently and carefully. Sam made sure to hold bucky by the waist firmly, just in case bucky fell and all did was smile, not complain for Sam's helpfulness.

Bucky felt alive around Sam. They both did around each other. People might think, wow, these two never argue, man, they are always so humble with each other, but let's get one thing straight, just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean that there are always going to be arguments. Yeah, everyone's there up's and down, relationships do, all do. Bucky and Sam didn't have it easy at first, hell, they were always on each other's asses, biting each other in the ass constantly over simple shit that didn't matter. It's not just that though, Sam and bucky just had an argument not too long ago, but it was a simple one, trying to sort things out, Sam telling bucky that he wants to help him more but bucky was simply not in the mood to talk about things like that so he yelled at Sam, yelled at him and he immediately shut down, feeling like his heart got ripped from his chest and thrown into the dump. His throat felt all of a sudden dry and raspy as tears began to well.

See, relationships ain't perfect, hell, sometimes we need some time away from the person, but for Sam and bucky, it wasn't like that, it was like they could never get away from each other, no matter how hard they tried, they just couldn't. When bucky wasn't talking to Sam at the time, when he was ignoring him, he couldn't help but feel like he was being such a bad person. His throat burned some nights as he thought of Sam, thinking about him, thinking about his smile, his lips, his eyes, everything, his personality. Bucky wanted to run down the street, just keep running until he reached Sams door step. He wanted so desperately to do so but he couldn't bring himself to, he was just so numb and drained that he couldn't. It felt like a big chore that would take everything in him to finish doing. Sam was all the same, he would stay up plenty of nights thinking about him but he didn't know why but when bucky told Sam that he didn't want him over at his house, he never did after bucky told him that, he just couldn't bring himself to. He didn't want to invade Bucky's privacy, but that day when Raynor came over in her car with bucky, that day Sam was planning on leaving the house and going to Bucky's, but that never needs to happen, because now, Sam and bucky are in each other's arms, bucky sometimes hear and there humming to the wonderful music as some played that he recognized.

Bucky hummed like it was the easiest thing in the world, it was smooth and deep, but oh so calming. He couldn't understand how bucky could do it, he couldn't at all, but man, he could listen to bucky all day, standing in this one spot for eternity as bucky hummed to the rhythm to the music that played in the room quietly. It was moments like these that Sam would never forget, it was something he would cherish for his life and always remember, same with bucky. Bucky breathed through his nose as he let another few hums out, sounding so beautiful to Sam's ears. It made Sam want to sleep, to fall into the bed and bucky hummed him to sleep. The sun was lowering, the sky lit brightly as it faded into colors like, orange, pink, yellow, red. It was so gorgeous that bucky actually pulled away for a moment to look to his right and out the window, the sun shining into the room brightly but it suited the moment right now, making this moment that they were in so much more better.