The Wonders In Our Head

.The Morning After The Breakup.

It was the morning after the breakup

but there was no change.

it was the morning after the breakup

I woke up to notifications on my phone

the majority were from him

but unlike every morning

I felt a lump in my throat

it was the morning after the breakup

but his snaps seemed very normal,

what was I expecting?

another bitter sad letter?

it was the morning after the breakup

his thoughts didn't consume me as such

and I didn't know if that was rude of me

it was the morning after the breakup 

I felt okay

I didn't cry in the bath 

nor did I skip my breakfast

it was the morning after the breakup

he went cycling with his brother

and I read a book

we talked about Hiroo Onada 

(and no it's for sure not Hero Honda)

and how depressing his story is 

and how they aren't many spare fucks to buy

and you couldn't believe how I didn't catch on to that double meaning 

it was the morning after the breakup

we sent reels to each other

and laughed at how funny they were

it was the morning after the breakup 

and we talked more than we would normally

it was the morning after the breakup 

but it didn't feel like a breakup 

it felt like two friends talking 

and the lack of a label didn't throw me off this time

it was the morning after the breakup 

and it felt okay to not be your girl anymore

but it wasn't a smile of content

nor a sigh of relief

it was the morning after the breakup 

there was just this feeling

and it looked like it wasn't gonna go away soon

it was the morning after the breakup

and I could only think of how it would feel

to look at him again and think

"I lost the guy who loved me for me"

and how I couldn't meet his eyes again

afraid that he'll see the heart eyes 

that I still look at him with

it was the morning after the breakup

and it hurts to think how your friends would react 

we were the IT couple

I hope their belief in love won't be shattered.

It was the morning after the breakup

life felt okay

there was a change

and that was okay.

It was the morning after the breakup

after staying up the whole night

sending messages of "how are you holding up?"

it was morning again

it was sunlight with him in it. 

it was the morning after the breakup

it felt shallow 

but it's okay 

it is just the morning after the breakup

and everything will soon change.

.17/11/2023.