are u with me

22

Tw ⚠️⚠️⚠️: SUICIDE, GROOMING
These next few chapters are pretty much a JJ chapters
2 hours later
the BAU

JJ's POV

Lunch with emily's mom actually went amazing. She wasn't too invasive... besides comments about us having kids which will not be happening any time soon.

Lunch got cut short due to me recieving a call about a case. I rushed back to the BAU and practically ran to Hotch's office. "We have a case." I say. "Where?" He sits up. Tears form into my eyes, knowing I can't present this case to the team without breaking down.

"Hotch" "JJ it's okay, breathe, take a seat." He sits me down. I feel myself start to hyperventilate. "A-... Aaron I can't go back there." I pass him the file.

"East Allegheny... your hometown... your sister." He says.

"Please can I stay here?" I sniffle. "JJ I need you working this case. You know this town inside and out and your insight could be helpful. I'll give you time off for a week after." He rubs my shoulder.

-

We are on the plane going over the case and I'm zoned out. The only thing I have paid attention to is 3 victims, all girls. But I didn't know any of them. They all moved there after I left.

"JJ.. have anything to add." Morgan asks. "No." I say. Obviously feeling uncomfortable. "You okay?" Emily asks and I don't answer. "JJ this is your hometown here, aren't you somewhat interested about what's going on?" Morgan says. "JJ's okay. Stop focusing on her and focus on the case."

They nod and get back to the case, except emily is eyeing me the whole time. I don't want to talk about it. I feel like I'm going through grief all over again. I stare out the window fiddling with the necklace my older sister gave me. I miss her. I drift to sleep.

Roslyn is upset. She was fighting with someone and then she was fighting with dad. Why has she been so mad at me all of the sudden. I thought she loves me.

"No matter what happens I'll always love you JJ" Roslyn puts a necklace around my neck. Roslyn's acting different. I open the bathroom door. Roslyn's dead. I freeze.

It's all spinning everything around me is spinning I can't do this anymore.

I wake up and emily's looking at me. "Hey sleepyhead." She smiles and I smile back.

I don't think I have it in me to do this at all.

I feel so alone. And I know I have all of these great people around me who care so much, and my wonderful girlfriend. But I need my big sister.

—

"Lead detective it's nice to meet you I'm Agent Hotchner and this is Agents Morgan, Rossi, Jareau, Prentiss and Dr Reid." "Nice to meet you Hotchner I'm detective Wilson.

"Agent Jareau..." he looks at me, "nice to see you again. I haven't seen you since you were a little girl."

He was the detective on my sister's case. They found the guy that caused her to commit suicide. But she's still gone.

"Nice to see you. Wish it was under better circumstances... seems like every time we meet someone's died." I start to walk away. "Hey, do you want to catch up later? Don't worry, completely professional I just want to check in."

I registered what he said, but I didn't answer. I was too focused on my sister picture in there wall. She was so beautiful. He turns around and looks at the picture. Then gives me a pat on the shoulder. "You turned out well kid. We are proud of you." He says.

-

3 hours later

The team is out and about trying to solve the case while I'm sitting in a conference room zoned out. They know something is going on with me but everytime they ask Hotch tells them to be quiet. They only call me when they have questions about the town or people in it.

They all piled back in with a suspect. I know that guy. I don't know how.

They're about to stick him in the interrogation room when he notices me and stops.

"Jennifer?" He says.

"I'm sorry... I don't remember I haven't been here for a while. Do I know you?" I ask. He looks down at my necklace and then looks back at me. "Yeah. Something like that.... " He says and they walk him into the room.

Something's off. "Hotch he knew Roslyn." I say to Hotch. "How do you know? I thought they caught the guy who groomed her." "They did. But he looked down at my necklace and he knew me. I don't remember him."

"I'll see what I can find out."

-

They nailed him. They found him guilty of the murders and they started carrying him out.

"I'm really sorry about your sister Jennifer. But if it were up to me, I would've told him to mess with you instead. You were the prettier one, and younger."

He knew. He knew my sister was being groomed and he did nothing about it. I jumped at him and Morgan and Emily held me back. "YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME!" I yell as I try to get out of their grip.

"Roslyn took everything from you. We never told her to kill herself." "Don't you DARE blame this on her." "You look exactly like your sister. Hopefully you don't turn out like her." He says and they walk him away.

I'm frozen. I swore to myself I would never freeze after Joslyn died. I can't move and everything in me wants to give up. My mother would tell me that this is a trauma. But this isn't a flight or fight response if I'm just frozen. He took my sister from me. They should've taken me instead.

-

Don't know how or when but somehow I got back on the plane. I had a blanket wrapped around me and I laid my head on Emily's lap. She strokes my hair and I can sense her worrying.

"JJ, take some days off. 2 days minimum a week max." Hotch says.