Make it stop - Minsung

Chapter 36

"Where are you going ?" Jisung asked in a joking angered tone, holding tightly Minho's wrist.

Minho chuckled at that, before trying to unleash himself.

"Can't I go to the bathroom, Hannie ?" He asked teasingly, smiling down at the boy laying in his bed.

Jisung shook his head firmly, not accepting.

For the last week, Jisung had been clinging to Minho a lot.

After their little arguement and Junseo's falldown, Jisung felt the need to be a lot closer to Minho. The moment they had woken up, cuddling tightly on the couch, Jisung hadn't left him alone for a minute. He had come to the realization that he almost lost the older, and he hated the thought. So he wanted closeness, and Minho obviously and very gladly gave him.

"I'll be quick" Minho said "You can continue the show" He said, poiting at the anime playing on Jisung's laptop.

The second Minho's came back, entering Jisung's bed covers, the younger cuddled to his side, once again not wanting to leave him alone.

Eunwoo had gave them a whole week off, especially so Minho could rest after overgoing such hard mental state. Even more regarding his past.

And Minho hadn't gone back to his dorm. He stayed in Jisung's room for the whole time.

He wasn't complaining, but maybe a little bit. If he stayed more time in here, watching Jisung's lips and trying to contain himself from kissing them, he'll go completely nuts.

Moreover, Minho was still madly in love with Jisung, and still very much touch and sex deprived, with a raging libido coming from the end of his addiction. So Jisung's behavior was constantly testing Minho's self control.

"Have we even slep together before this week?" Minho asked out of nowhere.

"We slept together a shit ton of times" Jisung snickered

"Not in that way, idiot" Minho rolled his eyes

"You did say that you missed having sex with me though" Jisung teased, and chuckled loudly when Minho whined

"I was drunk" Minho defended, shamefully

"But brutally honest" Jisung added with a laugh

"Well, I won't deny it" He said

"HUH?" Jisung asked, blushing suddenly

"You heard it" Minho shrugged

And Jisung felt like bursting in shyness, so he changed the conversation.

"No but actually, I don't remember sleeping with you" Jisung stated, thinking deeply "Maybe once or twice out of convenience or because of a show" He shrugged

"Isn't it that weird ?" Minho asked, turning his head to Jisung

"What do you mean ?" He asked back

"Why did you always leave after having sex ?" Minho asked, deeply curious.

He always wondered, but never had the guts to ask.

After they had seemingly admitted having feelings for each other, or in Jisung's case, used to, Minho started thinking a lot about the reason they didn't really try more being together.

"Um..." Jisung said, blushing so slightly.

"Don't answer if you don't feel comfortable" Minho reassured, pushing a strand of hair away from his forehead.

The show was still playing on background, but the two boys had found out the other was more interesting.

"No, it's okay" Jisung giggled, putting his head on his chest so the older wouldn't see his face "I spent a lot of time thinking I was having some kind of one-sided love, or impossible love with you... So I thought that we were balls deep into a situationship that wouldn't go anywhere... So yeah... I was scared of sleeping with you, only to be more disappointed when you'll say you don't like me back" He mumbled

"Same with aftercare ?" Minho asked

"Yes... Like, how was I suppose to not fall more for you if you kept on taking so sweetly care of me like that ?" He asked, chuckling dryly

"But I like you" Minho said, no shame behind his words.

"Stoop" Jisung asked

"Not but for real... I was scared as well, and then the whole coke situation just made me realize I couldn't be with you because of my fucked up addiction, but ... Before that ... We could have been together" Minho said, rambling a bit.

"You're right ..." Jisung responded, whispering.

Minho's hand didn't hesitate before brushing Jisung's hair, the feeling still bringing so much comfort to Jisung's mind.

"How's your head going lately?" Minho asked softly

"Better" Jisung said, grinning "Panics and overthinkings has lessened a lot" He explained

"Good" Minho responded.

After a moment of silence, and a long moment of overthinking for Minho, he decided to let out the weight off his chest.

"I'm sorry I pushed you back to self harming" He gulped, and Jisung could feel the hand caressing his hair shake so slightly "I- I don't want to trigger you by talking about this... But I really needed to apologize for this"

"Min" Jisung whined, raising his head to look at him in the eyes "You're at fault for hurting me, but not at fault for making me take such decisions as self-harming, okay?" Jisung tried to reason, seeing the pained and guilty face of the boy.

"That's basically the same thing" Minho chuckled dryly

"It's not. I'm mentally unstable, I could have hurt myself for thousands of reasons. It ended up being you, but it could have been, and it had been in the past, because of thousands of other dumb things" Jisung insisted.

"Yeah, and I knew very well how a struggle it was for you to be yourself, and I still hurt you. You don't need to tell me that so I'll feel better. You don't have to convince yourself it's not my fault when it is. I just need you to find the courage to forgive me" Minho said, and Jisung loved his way of thinking.

"Okay" Jisung whispered, still looking at him intensely.

"I want to help you out of it again" Minho pleaded, smiling softly

"Okay, I trust you to help me" Jisung smiled back "You did it once, I believe you can do it twice"

"Thank you for giving me a chance" Minho responded, eyes shining brightly.

"Thank you for trying hard for me" Jisung's eyes were shining equally.

Minho's gaze shifted down. Very briefly, because he was still trying his hardest to hold back, but the other's lips were calling for him a bit too loudly.

And Jisung noticed.

Very delicately, Jisung lowered down, only to put a light and very chaste peck on Minho's lips, too short to be called a kiss, as he raised back up right after, smiling sincerely back at him.