When I Found Myself

(Trying to be) Professionals

Do you ever just wanna like make a new life, cause u don't wanna die but u also hate living the way ur living at the current moment? Yeah same.

Anyway, I hope this chapter's ok, it's kinda all over the place at times but it should be fine overall.

Enjoy!

English lines appear like this, Korean lines appear like this, thoughts appear like this when used in complete sentences, author notes appear like this.

⚠️TW⚠️: Cursing

Timeline: Tuesday, October 22nd, 2019 - Friday, May 15th, 2020

Word Count: 2525

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

YOUR POV
—————————

It took you a while to get used to how you ended up living. 

After your mother legally disowned you, you got a message from the English police force informing you about the legal process your mom went through both to disown you and to file a restraining order against you. The officer who called you said they managed to negotiate a reasonable enough order. But still, you're no longer allowed to contact any of your direct family members, and you can't be seen or tracked within five miles of their residence.

You don't remember how much you cried that day. But it was certainly a lot.

But you weren't left with no family for long. That same day, you moved into a new dorm with all the members. Your Aunt Hana also reached out to you then. She told you you'd always be welcome to live with her, she'd heard from your mum about what had happened and disagreed with her completely on the matter. "I'm always here if you need," she'd said. And that touched a special place in your heart. It was an emotional day to say the least.

Slowly, you've adjusted to this new life. You've grown closer to everyone; the staff, the members, other idols, and people who you just happened to cross paths with. Mostly Chan and Felix, but another person you can now call your best friend is Seungmin.

The two of you are almost the same person. Sassy and good-tempered on the outside, on the verge of breaking on the inside. Not the best personality to have but at least you can understand each other. There's been many times where Seungmin pulled you aside and just let you get it all out, and many times where you did the same to him. The two of you love each other, and can't live without the other.

Another fun thing about living with three official producers who have a fantastic reputation with JYP, is that you as an individual are credited with all the songs you help write. So far that's only been one album, but still. People grow. By technicality, you are a co-producer of God's Menu, Phobia, TA, and Easy in the "Go Live" album.

You've also produced some solo songs which you have no intent on ever publishing. Changbin likes them, though. That's a real confidence booster for you, to be given praise by an actual producer. The other person who really appreciates your skill is Chan.

He'd been stuck on finding a beat for what will eventually become their title track when you walked in to give him lunch. "Thanks, mate," he'd said and you could see the lack of sleep in his eyes. After a quick argument about whether or not he should at least try to get some more sleep, you eventually compromise by trying to help him with the song. (He'd claimed it'd been the thing that was keeping him up at the time.)

After some fiddling on your part and a whole lot of respect gained for you on Chan's part, you finished with the iconic beat in the chorus of God's Menu.