I feel it pulling at my eyes,
Making my vision jitter,
Loosening my body, my mind,
And this is why I like it.
I'm always tired.
But not like this:
Not in a way that's
Oddly comforting.
I'm always emotionally drained,
Fighting an uphill battle,
But not like I was today,
Which feels so long ago it may have been yesterday,
Last week,
A year ago.
But being tired like I am now,
My body forcing the stress out of me bodily,
Forcing me into relaxation,
Forcing me into the enticement of sleep...
Its nice not to feel so worried all the time.
Sometimes.
Only in a safe place is it ever alluring to me,
Like my room, or
His warm arms.
Its so nice to have the sad, anxious, terrible thoughts ripped from your head,
The symptoms of them ripped from your body.
Its relieving in a way not much else is.
In an hour where I'm the only one here,
No other breathing, other heartbeat,
Matters.
I can be right next to him,
Yet this feeling remains the same,
And it's wonderful.
Its not that it makes me care about myself,
Just deafens all my worries into 'yesterday's and 'tommorow's.
Its peaceful, even though the effects of it cause later stress,
I can never find myself doing the 'responsible thing'
And going to bed 'on time'
Because these hours, wonderfully slim,
These hours, beautiful and silent and amazing,
These hours remind me that there's a fate waiting for me.
I can feel like this all the time one day.
One day, I can feel like I don't have to worry so much.
One day, it won't feel like my life is at the edge of falling apart,
One day, I'll be at peace with it.
Everything.
That's what these sleepless nights whisper to me.
YOU ARE READING
Air Conditioning
PuisiVent poetry It's frowned upon putting your heart on your sleeve with such a weak code like a three number pin. For both of our sakes I hope you aren't the type to spend your time digging your claws in and working to decode someone else's words an...
