HOW ABOUT ME

Chapter 3 : EVERYTHING IS SO HEAVY 😭💔

When we entered my unit he sat down on my sofa and I was just standing in the corner while crossing my arms.

"So what brought you here?" I ask harshly
"I came here because you didn't pick up my phone calls?"he answered
" Even p'aof and p'ker you didn't pick up too,what's happening to you?"he said
"Wow!!!! What's wrong with me ? Well NOTHING " I loud my voice
" And you just came to the office earlier, why don't you go inside the office and just stand there for an hour ?" he ask me
"If not from p'Ker ,me and p'aof didn't know that you already arrived there".he continued
" Well I got an emergency call so I am in a hurry to go back here ". I lied
"So what about that ?" P' in a curious tone
" Is none of your business!!and why you go here in this time?I said
" Tomorrow I will have a Media conference regarding the issue circulating online.And I want you to go there and support me when I announce about my dating issue" he said

In my inner thoughts: WHAT?? Is he crazy ?He wants me to witness that.. He didn't know that I was dying Inside.

"I want you beside me when I announce it tomorrow!! please na !! Can you do it for your favorite p'? pretty please na !!!"he continued

I remained silent when I heard it from him I don't know what to do .

If I go there ,it will hurt me more like torturing myself. But if I don't ,what would be the reason I will make excuses. And many of our fans will suspect that I am in hurt. Well it is true na .I am now going crazy.

"Please give me some encouragement Nong!! I am very nervous but if you are by my side I make myself feel ok and calm."he said
I didn't answer him by word and I just nodded .
He get up and go in my direction and hugged me and speak to my ear " thank you Nong ,you are my favorite in DMD "

After that he get off his hand from hugging me .
He says goodbye and then he went to his home .After he left I was just lying on my bed and suddenly my tears was now falling. Why would I agree, I know that's not helping me.After an hour of wondering I didn't notice until I sleep.

I wake up because my phone was ringing.
" Nong where are you na?
"In my bed " I answered
"Huh?did you forget that I have a Media conference today at 10 in the morning? and it's almost 8;30 na! please hurry up na .. pretty please 'he pleased me
"Ok " in my cold voice

I hung up the call and murmured why he was so demanding, damn !!!!
I take a bath and dress up.. When I am fixing myself in front of the mirror I ask myself "Do I really need to do this?" And my tears silently fell down and I felt so strange so I wiped out my tears and cheered up.

I took a taxi and I arrived exactly 30 minutes before the conference.
And P'net come with me and said "finally you're here"
"Nong do you know what you gonna do there?"p'aof talked
"Yes p' I prepared myself before I went here"

And then I feel so nervous like my heart beat can hear so badly. I'll try to calm myself and we step up in the conference hall . There are a lot of cameras and interviewers from different media's.

There's a lot of questions that they thrown and ask for P'net and he answered it smoothly like he really prepared for this.

🙋: So do you really date that girl?
🤷: And what about the fans says in this issue? Some of those are not happy with that.

"Well it's Yes!!! I am dating that girl
And for those fans who accept me after the issue I will recognize you as my true family.And to those fans that are not happy about it you can free to leave and block me anytime you want , because I will not forces you to accept me if it's not your like.

🙋:How about you Nong James,what do so say about this?

I'm about to panic but when my gaze capture the eyes of my P' I calm myself in a minute before I answered.

"I'm.....
I'm...
I'm... I'm happy for my p'.. he really found his happiness to that girl.. and to those people who threw bad comments about that,please stop it because we are a human after all. Like what is saying, " choose what chooses you ",yeah !! Just like that, what makes you happy choose to live with it and don't take the chances away from you ." "So you haven't felt regret in the end" I continued.

Wow I'm so proud of myself after saying that with confidence.. Not showing any sympathy of sadness in my inner thoughts. Smiling to stop the tears from falling.

But somehow the people get surprised when P' come back in stage with a beautiful woman. I didn't pay attention to him when I was explaining a minute ago and he went backstage. And he went back in stage with his......

"Guys ,she Is the girl we talking about ..She is Mae ,my girlfriend!!" P' proudly announce to all

Wait what? His what?? girlfriend? OMG I thought they just dating !!! And I got shocked when P' kissed his girl in her forehead.. I'm about to collapse when I witnessed that kind of situation that I didn't expect. Then the people in the hall were shouting and sent congratulations to both of them .

I can't take it anymore. When the people are on the couple's attention I go smoothly to went backstage and run in the storage room. In the dark area I sit down and I feel so devastating. I'm crying so badly not knowing that there are also a person inside the room .. then he talk first " James are you alright?"
I was shocked when he talk and I immediately stop from crying . It was yim and I didn't notice him following me from behind when I went out from the hall,he kept following me.
" P' this is yim . I'm sorry for following you earlier because I'm just concerned about you " he said
" Earlier I noticed that you are not comfortable when P' introduces his faen and kisses her in front of the media ,so when you went backstage I followed you na " he explained.

I hugged him and tell him to go anywhere away from this place.
We went to a road which is far away from the city. Where no house at all and just the tree and grass welcoming you . A cold breeze of wind hugging me like what I needed this time . Me and Yim were also friends like my real brother in the company that we work in. So I have no choice,I tell all about my feelings for my p' . He was just listening to my story and we didn't realize that we were crying at the same time. It helps me lighting my feelings.Atleast,I have someone to talk about how I was broken right now (because Yok is in my hometown) .
He understands me and keep comforting me and he confessed to me that some of them (my workers) are they noticed me that I have something special feelings for my p'. They didn't want or dare me to ask because they are also afraid that I will feel strange to them.

We keep talking to each other and shouting like crazy (after all no one can hear us we are away from the city).after 4 hours we decided to go back home,he drove his car and I just sit beside him.
"P'James, wake up !where here na" Yim shook my shoulder and I wake up and rub my eyes .I didn't notice that I was in deep sleep,because I think I'm tired from shouting and crying.

" thank you Yim from accompanying me ,it makes me feel lighting a bit ." I smiled at him and say goodbye and get up from his car.
He opened his car windows and waved at me ".and if you need me just don't forget to call me anytime"he remained at me and said goodbye and he drove.

Big thanks to Yim he helped me to release some of my pain in my heart

When I'm in my room after taking a Bath I tried to open my phone
...wow trending worldwide #netmae
Yeah I'm hurt but I convince my self that I don't deserve a one side love ... I don't deserve to be lonely, that I deserve to be happy to the person who was happy with me too .

"God, I'm may not be your strongest soldier,but I'll try my best to be strong" I just said to wind coming from my opened window.

The best option to do so is to go to the flow, so that you will not be left behind.
Just like waters falling down from the mountains ,down to the river and meet the final destination -- in the ocean..
No matter what I believe that what will happen to us there's a reason behind this to test us and make us strong and every situation.

Author: hey guys this girl is my imaginary character and please don't take it too seriously just from my mind ...

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