Axel

51

I S A B E L L A

His nose brushes the skin on my neck, his deep breaths syncing with mine as he holds me.

Im drunk on lust and bad decisions.

In his arms i feel alive.

A million thoughts race through my mind and yet none of them are enough to push him away, even though that's what i should be doing.

However, he's first to pull away. His hands brush over my ass as he softly sets me on my feet, i pull my dress down as he tucks himself in again.

His moans and deep breaths are now replaced by the loud music and i'm reminded we are at Ethan's house.

I feel anything but alive now. Reality has seeped in and i'm forced to blink away the tears as he leaves the balcony and disappears into the bathroom.

I stayed glued to the wall behind me, my trembling hand pulling the straps of my dress back onto my shoulders.

The moment feels bittersweet, the air smells of sex and i can hardly think straight after he wasted no time to set me down and rush off to clean up.

Im there for a few long moments before i push of the hard wall and walk into the dark bedroom, the only source of light coming from the bathroom, where the sound of water running attracts me to the doorway.

His back is facing me, and although he's lost weight his muscles are prominent and bulge when he leans down to wash his face, his neck and even his chest?

I should leave. I'm going to leave.

I'll leave and pretend this didn't happen. I'll tell Lucy i got lost and i won't let my heart break over it. I'll move on because that's what we need to do.

And yet my feet refuse to move, my eyes stayed glued to him and he straightens out and looks into the mirror.

I can taste something sour on my tongue, something like confrontation and the need to spit out everything i've been thinking. That precise taste keeps my feet glued to the ground.

His lips are clean again, the lipstick marks are gone and there is no trace of what we done left on him.

And i'm covered in hickeys and smudged lipstick. He rid of any evidence like i'm some sort of dirty secret.

Noah hasn't been around as much as he used to, we knew why. He's never made it a secret nor known  that he's been around Axel a lot more, but it wasn't hard to figure out. Yet nobody knows what they do, or where they go or what's going on.

Ethan's been on edge because Noah has been acting different, using all his energy and time on Axel and now Axel is washing himself like i'm a fucking mistake.

Just what have they been discussing with one another that Axel feel the need to hide me.

He's never hid me before.

And thinking of it, he's never sought me out when i was only alone. He never cared where we were or who was around he would always find me and hold me without shame, and now he followed me around until i was alone to put me in my place.