Her Love

When women support women

Jaanki's POV

I didn't want him to go. Of course, I didn't. But I asked him to go, and he went. I wanted him with me, I was feeling like shit. But I asked him to go to her, trying to be the bigger person. I wanted him to deny and be with me. I'm being so immature. I always prided my clear communication skills, and here I was, being as unclear as I could be. But Raghav understood me, right? He always knew what I felt without me having so say anything. Why wasn't he understanding now? Or did he not want to? Was he still in love with her? Did he want to be with her? I knew he would never cheat. He wasn't that cheap. But he could always leave me. Would he? Before I could spiral anymore, Raghav walked in. I was lying on my side of the bed, and so, I pretended to sleep. He caressed my hair and slept himself.

Raghav's POV

I knew I had to be with Jaanki. But Gayatri had just faced the man she was terrified of. So, I went to her and made sure she was fine. She wasn't fine but wanted to be alone and asked me to go to Jaanki. I, too, wanted to go to her as soon as possible. So I rushed to the room, only to find her asleep. I didn't know what she thought of me leaving her to go to Gayatri. She asked me to go though. How could she be fine with me going to Gayatri, when she knew what my past was? Did she not care? Did it not affect her at all? I caressed her hair, wanting my thoughts to be proven wrong. I slept on my side facing Jaanki's back.

The next morning I woke up to find Jaanki sleeping, with a frown. She often did that when she was stressed. But why was she stressed now? Everything at the office was fine; I personally made sure that meetings or projects would not stress her out. I shook her to try and wake her up. She opened her eyes softly, trying to look at me. "Am I late?" she asked, groggily. "No, but why are you stressed?" I asked her. She sat up, trying to awaken her sleepy self. "I'm not stressed," she said. "Jaanki, you don't frown in your sleep unless you are stressed," I stated. "It might've been a bad dream. I don't remember. I'm fine, Raghav," she tried to convince me. I wasn't fully convinced but I let it go nevertheless. She got out of bed and left to brush her teeth before proceeding to the gym. I, too, left to do my routine.

I reached the dining room for breakfast to find Aashi and Arjun sitting with Jaanki. They were discussing something about decorations. I joined them. "Bhai yeh kaisa rahega sangeet keliye?" Aashi asked me, showing me the picture of a venue. "Tujhe pasand hai?" I enquired. "Haan bohot," she replied. "Toh then bas, yahi final," I declared. "Dekhiye apne bhai ko, He doesn't like it. He's like ghar pe karlete hai. But I want to go all out. You know I love dancing. I'm fine with doing all the other events at home. I'm giving in for everything else and he doesn't want to adjust even this one thing," she complained, whining.

"Bhai, how do you think this would be?" "You like it?" "Very much." "That's what matters. This is final." "Just look at your brothers. He's asking to get it done at home." 

"Arjun kyu kar raha hai asie?" I asked. "Bhai aapko pata hai na mujhe sab ghar pe karna pasand hai," he said. "Haan, and everything is happening at home, right? She just wants this one event to happen at this venue which isn't even far from home. Can't you adjust? And shaadi bas ek baar hoti hai. A girl has many dreams regarding her marriage. Since childhood, she must've thought ki mai shaadi aise karungi vaise karungi. And she's just asking for one event. Chup chaap maan ja," I said, ending the conversation. Arjun nodded, understanding me.

"Arjun, why do you say so?" "Bhai, you know I like doing everything at home." "Marriage happens just once. Since childhood, she must've thought out everything about her wedding. Just agree to it."

I looked to my side, to find Jaanki involved with Aashi. I recollected the words I had just spoken. Every girl does have dreams about how she wants to get married, about the clothes she'll wear, about everything. Jaanki never got that chance. I remember my mother speaking very fondly of her marriage, showing me pictures, and expressing her happiness. Jaanki never got any of thet. We got married in such a hurry. We didn't even have pictures of the day. Yes, we did have pictures of the reception we held to announce our wedding to the world. But that wasn't any compensation, was it? I stared at Jaanki, feeling bad about it. I never even bothered to ask her about what she imagined her wedding would be like. And she never complained.

"Kitna ghuroge bhabhi ko, bhai?" Arjun teased me, smirking. Jaanki tilted her head to me and then looked down, shy. I glared at Arjun. And continued with my breakfast, having decided to ask Jaanki about her dreams about how she wanted to get married. "We have to visit the doctor today, right?" I questioned, looking at Jaanki. "Yes, at 6," she informed. "Okay, I'll pick you up," I said and left for work. All through the day, I couldn't stop thinking about Jaanki. Of course, I was concerned for Gayatri, but I couldn't get the visual of Jaanki sobbing in my arms. What had brought her so much pain? I had always seen her as a strong woman, which she was, but I completely forgot to acknowledge the kind of life she had. She went through so much alone; I at least had my siblings to call family. She had no one. I don't know how much pain must be buried deep within her.

"How much will you stare at bhabhi, Bhai?"

But what I wanted to know right now was what led to her breaking down that day. Did we say something that reminded her of her pain? I just never want to see her cry again. I was just starting to realize how much her tears affected me. Just as I was lost in my thoughts, my mobile rang. It was Gayatri. I answered. "Raghav, I need an advocate. I'm going to file a domestic violence case against Karan," she declared. I was ecstatic that she finally found the courage. I was curious, what changed her mind that quickly? "I'm happy you decided to do so. But why this change? That too so suddenly," I questioned. "I'll let you once you come back. But for now please ask an advocate to meet me before I lose my courage," she said desperately. I agreed and asked a trusted advocate of mine to go and meet her. I looked at my phone to realize that I had to go pick up Jaanki for her appointment. And so, I left.

Jaanki's POV

I was in my room, reading a book, when I saw Gayatri walk past. I swiftly followed her. Of course, I was insecure and jealous but I was concerned as well. She had faced her perpetrator. She didn't look fine. She had been lost in her thoughts since Karan Thaapar came home yesterday. I was worried. I saw her walking aimlessly, just staring into nothing. "Gayatri," I called out. She turned around and just looked at me. "Can we talk?" I asked. She thought for a while and nodded. I led her to the library at home and we got seated on the couch there.

"Are you okay?" I started. "Honestly, no," she said, looking down at her feet. "Can I ask you something?" I asked, wearily. I did know she was abused but I didn't know how comfortable she would be sharing it with me. We had just met, so, of course, it would be valid for her not to want to share anything with me. "Please ask Jaanki, you don't need permission." "Why haven't you filed a domestic violence case against him?" I enquired. "I'm scared. That's why. I don't know how to explain it to you, but I'm not strong like you or Raghav. All my life, I was shielded from anything that could remotely hurt me. I didn't go through life like the both of you did. Sometimes, I'm amazed at your courage. You, especially, Jaanki. I don't know how you managed everything by yourself. I could never be like you. I'm not as strong as you," she said, a sad smile playing on her lips.

"Yes, you are not me, Gayatri. And that's because you have something I don't. You have the love and support of people you can call your own. I had to go through it alone, I didn't have a choice. But you do. From what you told me, your family loves you. That's your strength. If my resilience is my strength, then the love your family holds for you is yours. Don't make that your weakness. And that man killed your baby, Gayatri. Don't let him get away with it," I stated, looking at her. She looked at me with tears in her eyes. But there was something else in her eyes. "You know what Jaanki? I always thought I was weak because I didn't know how to get through life alone. You just made me realize that I didn't have to do it alone. I have my family. You made me realize that strength doesn't always mean being alone. Thank you so much," she said, her voice filled with gratitude.

I gave her a small smile and left her to her thoughts. She just needed a reminder that she wasn't alone. I gave her that. I heard her call Raghav and ask him for an advocate, as I was walking out. I smiled to myself and entered my room. I looked at the time, and it was almost half past 5. Raghav would be here in a few minutes. I brushed my hair and got into a comfortable co-ord set and left for the meeting hall to wait for him.