Protection

First therapy session

On the way to therapy, I think mum noticed how nervous I am because she handed me some of the fidget toys that dad apparently keeps in his glove box for me. I play with them all the way to therapy, relaxing slightly.

That is until we got there. I keep taking deep breathes and squeezing the stress ball and it seems to be working. Mum comes into the waiting room with me but dad said he has to go to work so they aren't down too many detectives. Me and mum were sat together in the waiting room and I was holding her hand, playing with her rings until Dr Reese came out into the waiting room. "Amber Lindsey?" I look to mum and she nods at me so I slowly stand up. I turn around expecting mum to be getting up to come in with me but she isn't. Well isn't this just great.

I walk over to her and she smiles at me. "Hello again Amber." I give her a slight wave and she leads me into the room she had just come out of. When we go in, I see that the room is filled with toys. I don't like it. I'm 15, not a child. "You can have a look around whilst we talk if you'd like to." I don't move so she sits down and starts to speak to me again. "How have you been since yesterday Amber?" I shrug my shoulders, not looking at her, scared she would see right through me. "Well in these sessions, we're hopefully going to talk about things that scare you and help you get over them and the events that happened over the last few years." I just nod my head and she lets out a little sigh. "Would you like to talk about anything in particular for this hour?" I shrug my shoulders again. "How about coping mechanisms? Shall we start with talking about them?" I nod my head so that she will stop asking questions.

That plan didn't last too long though. "Do you have any coping mechanisms that you use?" I just nod my head. I don't want to say it out loud because she's going to think it's stupid. "Can I know what it is?" I don't move. "Amber? You there?" I nod my head. She stays quiet for a few minutes before speaking up. "Is it an unhealthy one?" I nod my head. She knows what it is.

"When was the last time you did it?" I speak extremely quietly. "The day that they took me. At school. That's why I left the district. I didn't want to show mum or dad..." She nods her head before speaking again. "Well I'm happy that you haven't done it since then. What I think I'm going to do is give Erin a list of healthy coping methods for you to use. Other than your unhealthy one, do you have any other ones?" I pick at the skin on my fingers, thinking of one. "I used to skate and sing... I don't really do either of them anymore though." She looks at me smiling, slightly. "Why did you stop?" I shift the pressure from one foot to the other. "Matthew, my old carer, broke my skateboard and yelled if I was too loud in the house and I just never really picked it back up." She nodded her head at me before speaking again. "Well I think that it would be a brilliant idea to get back into singing and maybe skating if you can get a board?" I think for a second. "Won't mum and dad get mad about it though?" She shakes her head. "I highly doubt that. They want you to get better and if you doing these things help then I think they will both be very happy about it." I nod my head.

We spent the rest of the session talking about different coping methods that she is going to give mum and the time goes faster than I thought it would. "Sadly, our first session has come to an end Amber." I finally move from my spot, standing in the entrance to the room. She stands up and walks over to the door opening it. "Thank you Dr Reese." "I look forward to seeing you next week if you decide you want to continue."

We walk out of the room and back into the waiting room where mum was sat on her phone. "Hey mum!" She looks up and smiles at me. "Hey honey! You ready to go?" I nod and walk over to her. "Before you go Erin, I'm going to send some healthier coping methods for Amber to you that she can try." Mum nods and we all say bye and me and mum left to go out to the car. Once we were in the car, mum turned to me. "What did you think?" I stay quiet for a second before answering. "It was okay. I think I want to continue it. Dr Reese is really easy to talk too." Mum smiled and sat in her chair properly. "I'm glad you want to get better."

We head home to find a couple of dog toys in the garden. "Why are there dog toys?" Mum looks at me, equally confused, and we both walk into the house.

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Hey y'all! How have you all been?

Sorry it's been a little while since I updated. I've been dealing with a bit of writers block but hopefully I'm back now.

If you haven't already, go drink some water and grab something to eat, you deserve it!

If you have any suggestions let me know <3